Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Well I did 13 minutes on my recumbant bike today.
today was a good day emotionally i laughed a lot and was in good spirits.
i stopped when i felt weak and sweaty. im just glad i got in the ten like spark says. that is good for me.
i wanna beat myself up so bad for things of the past and how i went from being healthy to this but im done living in the past, that is what got me fat.
im here in the future. my head needs to focus on today and today only.
i dont need to look at others and their progress or what they need to loose.
i need to focus on me and me alone so i will not down myself for needing to loose more than this one person weighs etc. this is the reason i failed the last time i lost weight.
i compared myself to others and i beat myself up and i felt guilty and worst of all I gave up when i was doing so good cause i just didn't love myself enough to keep going.
But im loving myself now. and im convinced I can take this weight off.
Ive never been skinny. I dont want to be skinny. Im not in bad health. i haven't got one health problem except im fat and thank god for that.
i wanna get down to 200 again. most people think that is still big. but it was not big on me.
im tall. and i was comfortable at 200.
i put my goal at wanting to get 130 but i would be happy to get to 200.
i would be happy to even loose 20lbs.
im so ready to feel free of this fat cage that ive imprisioned myself in.