Intro: I have too much stuff. I weigh too much. I think it's related.
I finally organized the top of my dresser.
Time to take a deep breath and dive into its ugly innards.
I'm not sure why it's so difficult for me to change my ways. I set a goal, work at it, achieve some success, enjoy the pleasure that comes with same... and then slide right back.
Am I against a little accomplishment? A little happiness? Spontaneous giddiness NOT brought on by a second glass of wine after dinner?
I know what helped me lose 60 lbs. last year. Unfortunately some of those conditions have changed. I'm no longer unemployed, so I have less time to work out, and no access to a computer at work so I have limited time to track and network on SP. Plus, dealing with all this stuff - cleaning it, tidying it, digging through piles to find what I need... it's just exhausting. It robs me -
IT isn't robbing me of anything.
I'm robbing myself.
Ever play the game ďchange one letter?Ē
As long as Iím dealing with all this stuff, I donít have time to do the things I want to do. I havenít done those things in so long I donít even know what they are. I don't have to face the relationships I've let lapse. I don't have to finish my degree, paint, draw or even take care of myself properly. I don't have to worry about being rejected if I'm busy dusting, sorting, keeping busy with the endless piles of crap I bought to fill the holes that should be filled with friends, family, education, art and the occasional weekend road trip.
I do know I'm ready to strip away the layers.
I will keep working on it until it's fixed.
I need the drawer space for art supplies.
This is the drawer that's part of the dresser (now cleaned off) that sits in the bedroom in the house full of junk that I built.
Sigh. I know.
Here are the three things I picked out.
1. The user's manual to a Bluetooth headset I no longer own. Even if I still owned the headset I could probably look up anything I need to know online. I have three other Bluetooth headsets. The didn't exist about 10 years ago, then I couldn't live without one, now I haven't bothered with one in about a year.
Result? An easy toss. With headsets to come, I think.
2. The black thing is something you'd use with an iPhone 3. It functions as both a case and extends the battery life - you charge it and then plug in your iPhone 3, then immediately get a warning that this accessory is not meant for the iPhone 3 and you ignore this seemingly important bit of advice only then your phone starts acting real real weird (crashing to desktop, shutting itself off, etc. etc.) and you didn't spring for AppleCare so you never use said case/charger again and you've long since bought an iPhone 4.
Result? Toss. But not immediately. My townships has a once-a-year drop off for stuff like batteries, electronics, paint and other environmental hazards. It's now in the box.
3. Reading glasses in their case. I forgot I even had these. I bought them about 10 or more years ago as a fashion accessory. Everyone was wearing smart-girl glasses then. I take stupid pride in the fact that I am nearly 50 but I don't yet wear bifocals. Like it's my superpower or something. It's not that getting bifocals would make me feel old, it's just that I waited a long time to afford contact lenses, I hated glasses and I don't want to wear glasses again. I don't want more equipment.
My eye doctor was impressed that I'd escaped this long and when I had my exam in January he said I still didn't need bifocals but that sooooon.... very soon.... I might. If I had trouble threading a needle or reading fine print on pain relievers and still did not feel moved to get bifocals, I should pick up a pair of reading glasses at the drugstore. And use better light.
I admit, I feel the need creeping up on me. I hold things at arm's length. I read and then look up to see something on TV and have trouble focusing back and forth.
Then I found these glasses.
And put them on.
Dammit. Reading... so... clear. Sight... so... dear.
Result: Repurposed from fashion accessory (honestly, what was I thinking? Not as bad as leg warmers and poofy skirts, but silly all the same) to functional tiny red frames perched on the edge of my nose in no way making me look like a fussy old lady.
"We will either find a way or make one." ~Hannibal