Tuesday, February 26, 2013
I just looked at my last blog entry last year this same time and realised that my lent promise was the same but like last year I am having a hard time living up to it. I may just have to simplify and make a simple promise to do better.
I am trying to give up sweets but it is killing me. During the day all I can think about is something sugar filled, like chocolate and jam and granola bars. I managed to stop eating candy but the chocolate fetish and ice cream dreams are hard to take at the 3:00 pm witching hour. Forget midnight, I swear the devil sets his minions out to work on all of us trying to change our lives at 3:00pm in the afternoon. I manage to be good until then and then my personal demons start nagging in my ears. My stomach full now "but how about a little something sweet to round out the meal" it says. "just a few calories dont worry you can burn them off in the gym. besides a sweet girl like you needs a little sweetness." And the torture goes on til about 6 pm when it switches to "just a little taste of his food to check to make sure it tastes ok." what about a little fruit and some chips, maybe eevn a energy bar haha.. that is healthy right." " boy that fish kinda bland you need to get some nice fatty burger meat. give you sustenance for the gym. A little ice cream to cool the throat and if you walk for it guess what you can have a larger size." It is like this every day. I am now convinced that the demon on my shoulder is made of chocolate, icecream and potato chips.
Maybe there is a need for serious prayer for motivation as I need a large angel on the other shoulder if I am to pull through.
On another note, I achieved a number of great things this year. I am wearing a size 12 pants (still a size 14 jacket) and I can see my collar bones. I couldn't believe my eyes when one day I saw the hint of a ridge instead of smooth neck/shoulder area. Amazing. I can't wait til someone says they can drink soup from my collar bones. lol.
I also ran the 2nd leg of the bahamas marathon with my team. That is 7 miles and this was from me who could bearly run the 5k last year this same time. I loved it and need to start back running as I want to run a 1/2 marathon this year.
So tomorrow I need to get the devil off my back, put some motivation in my pocket and get up at 5:00 am and run or go to the gym. I need to run myself into a size 10 pants.