Monday, February 25, 2013
Spark and I are still going strong. It's been a solid couple months of tracking and 30 lbs down since October. In the grand scheme of things (the yo-yos since my high weight of 250 4 years ago) I am now down 50 lbs. Actually, 51. I am in one-derland. I am half way to my goal. I am down 50 pounds! It's almost too much to take it. I am having a hard time processing all that information. If these milestones came separately, I think I would be equally excited and proud of all them. Hitting a few big ones at once is overwhelming. Of course, I have my demotivational side that says, "Don't get too excited, you have a long way to go." I'm trying to shut her up right now. Not only have I stuck to my lifestyle change for well over 2 months, I've hit some major milestones. And I have overcome my biggest obstacle. Myself. The "all or nothing" attitude I had in the past is long gone. I have gone out for a burger and beer. I have had pizza. I just do it all OCCASIONALLY now. Most importantly, I still track it. That was always so hard for me. I couldn't bear to see what I was doing to myself, so I stuck my head in the sand and didn't track it. I figured I messed up, so what was the point and the streak was over. Now I understand that if I track everything and eat really great, I can still have a little splurge without completely de-railing. Even my splurges are usually healthier choices (veggie pizza instead of pepperoni) and portion controlled (2 slices instead of 4 or 5).
So I really feel like I have finally nailed the food intake. However, I have fallen off my exercise routine. I have a reason and refuse to get depressed or beat myself up for it. Four times a year, for about 3 weeks at a time, I work 12 hours a day, 7 days a week. I am currently 15 days in. I have officially cut myself some slack. In a few days, I will be done and back on the exercise track. If I beat myself up for it, I will get discouraged and say, "What's the point?" and talk myself out of going back because I already messed up. I can't fix yesterday and I can't be perfect all the time. I can focus on today. I can plan my meals (including an occasional less than optimal choice - I hate the words "cheat", "indulgence", etc. It makes me feel like I am doing something wrong and I don't think I am) and I can plan my exercise. Then I work the plan. I am averaging a little over 1.5 lbs a week for the last 2 months. I'll take it.