Monday, February 25, 2013
Ok, so I am about to go on a bit of a rant here. Not like a yelling thing, more of a wake up and smell the coffee thing.
I know that this site, and many others similar(but never the same, because really? No one is as awesome as this site....and this one is free!) to this one are all doing their best to help people put and end to being overweight. And that is why we are all here, right? To be able to gather all the tools to not be overweight anymore.
So here is my dilemma....
With all of the push to be better healthier versions of our current selves, what about liking ourselves for who we are RIGHT NOW.
Don't get me wrong, I am totally stoked about the thought of losing weight and shopping in a regular store and not having to seek out the "fat people section." But I am also realizing that self loathing and self depreciating isnt going to get me any farther from the fat section.
For instance, I am a severe asthamatic. Losing weight will not make me not have asthma, I have had it for a lot of my life. Will losing weight make my asthma better? Probably. Will losing weight protect me from a lot of deadly health diseases? Absolutely. But will losing weight make me a better person? I dont think so. I think that my weight is not a determining factor for who I am. I am going to be who I am no matter what I look like. Will some things be easier? OMG yes!! Will I possibly be more outgoing and want to try new things? Again, possibly.
My point is that I read a lot of blogs, and see us encouraging each other in our weight loss goals. I think this is AMAZING and would never ask anyone to stop. But I think that we should also be praising people for being good people. Or tell someone that they are beautiful.
How many have you have heard "you are pretty, but you would be a stunner if you dropped a few pounds", or "you have such a pretty face", or even" You are an amazing person, I wish you would take better care of yourself." Any of these in any variation will cut any person to the core. So what do we do, we feel worse about ourselves, and resolve to not be "ugly and fat".
I know I am pretty. I was blessed with a great smile, a charming personality, and beautiful blue eyes. I also have other assets that are quite eye catching too, lol. But most of all, I am beautiful because I strive to be a good person even though I have the majority of society telling me that I am not good enough, and wont be good enough until I LITERALLY fit into societies norms.
My main reason for writing this, is because out of everything I have read on this site, from member blogs to coaches information, the reason people are fat is never dealt with. I know I have A LOT of issues around food. I binge, I overeat too often, and I have no sense of self or portion control. The reason I have these issues is much deeper than just that I am fat. I was taught very young that food is a bad/guilty/treat/pleasure thing. Not just something that sustaines me so that I can find things in life that are actually fulfilling. Because of this, I have food issues.
People need to work on figuring out their food issues along with losing weight. That is part of the tools to losing weight.
OK, so now that my rant has gone all over the map, and I am sure I sound all sorts of crazy, let me recap
1. You are beautiful and worthy of love and good things NO MATTER what size you are or will be.
2. Work on your food issues. Find the reason you dont eat to live, but live to eat and work on it!
Thanks for reading