Sunday, February 24, 2013
Last week I explored how my lifestyle choices were setting me up for success or for failure. I found that a lot of choices I have been making are setting me up for failure: lack of sleep, not eating during the day, not prioritizing my meals or exercise. I did 4 days in a row of at least 10 minutes of exercise. Then, I took two days off and rested.
So, yesterday I started my streak again. Actually, I started the day before. Because the day before I went to sleep early -- 9 pm. I gave myself time to workout on Saturday instead of cramming my day with "productive" but not self-loving chores. I also chose to exercise even though I didn't want to. I ate well throughout the day, but then contiued to eat when I stayed up late watching TV. I went to bed at 2 a.m.
This is going to be a work in progress!! One step forward, two steps back. My weight loss journey is not a metaphor for life, it is a description of my life so far. I look at how far I have come as a human being: as a young professional woman into a seasoned, confident professiona; as a woman recovering from abusive relationships living in a loving, non-abusive relationship; as a young girl who was taught to hate herself who now knows how to comfort herself when those feelings arrive.
Learning to change these circumstances, to use my own power to make choices that help me, essentially moving through those places into a more self-loving and safe life has taken me a lot of time. It has often been one step forward, two steps back. But, I kept putting one foot in front of the other, and over time, I have transformed my life. I can do that with my weight, too. In fact, I have done it before and lived at a healthy weight for 10 years. I can do this again.
Wow. It takes a lot to write that. It gives me pause. I am so used to being critical of myself, but this is what I have truly accomplished. I have transformed myself from a victim to a survivor to a person who thrives in life. Truly amazing. So, another couple of lessons learned for me on my weight loss journey:
LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE; LOOK AT WHERE I STARTED NOT JUST WHERE I AM. THIS IS THE TRUE MEASURE OF PROGRESS.
RECOGNIZE WHAT I HAVE ALREADY ACCOMPLISHED AND CELEBRATE IT. NO NEED TO HIDE IT!
PUT MY WEIGHT IN PERSPECTIVE OF LIVING A SELF-LOVING LIFE. BE BRAVE ENOUGH TO CONTINUE ON MY PATH OF SELF-HEALING AND SELF-LOVE.
So, one step forward, two steps back. I will get there. My weight will adjust. What is important is that I keep putting one foot in front of the other and honoring the courage it takes to do that.
Warm wishes to my fellow sparklers on your own journeys!