Sunday, February 24, 2013
It has been a crazy two weeks to say the least!
I am not going to get into details, but I will say that I have felt pretty much every emotion a person can feel. The only thing that is clear in my life as I write this, is that I want to make peace with my body. I want her to be healthy and loved. I don't want to trash her, treat her terribly or feed her crude anymore.
Tomorrow, I want to start to go sugar free (meaning no candy, cookies, ice cream, etc) until my 35th birthday, which is May 13th. I want to do this to see how it changes by body, my mind, my emotions. Today, I saw my Dad smoke cigarettes. He smoked when I was a little girl. I was so upset with him because all I could see was that he was choosing cigarettes over life with us, losing minutes as he puffed away. On my way home...I realized I was doing the same thing. Only, instead of cigarettes, I was opting for food. I have been choosing food over life with my loved ones.
No more. Life is not worth food. Period. I don't want to exchange minutes of my life, or even seconds of my life for food. A cheeseburger is not worth loss of time (in any increment) with my father or my mother or any of my other loved ones. For the last 34 years, I have made that so. No longer. I cannot chose that willingly anymore.
As Steve Jobs once said, "My favorite things in life don't cost any money. It's really clear that the most precious resource we all have is time." I believe he was right and I don't want to throw any more gifts of time in the garbage.
Start living, not existing, today.