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    DARWHOHOO   25,293
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Thinking of leaving

Saturday, February 23, 2013

I took an impromptu brea rom all things spark this week to relieve myself of this heavy burden of hope. I was so sick of tracking and exercising and supporting others when nothing has been happening to me. See, there is so much time you can say, at least I haven't gained, or I feel smaller or it will happen. Every time I came here on SP, instead of a success story I keep feeling like a failure and this past week, I never had to feel that. So, do I quit SP (if I do I will miss you Ramona and Fran, who have never stop supporting me) or do I continue, knowing nothing will change? Guess I held that in for too long

Sigh....
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AUGUSTAGLOOP 3/2/2013 8:13AM

    If you feel like you're starting to define yourself by your diet, as though your life is only a success or a failure if you are 'good' that day or if the scale is being nice or if you exercise, then yes, you should definitely take a break. It's easy to lose perspective when you're focused on one aspect of your life too intensely.

If you do decide to take a break though, it doesn't mean you've failed! No one wins or loses, and you're not competing with anyone - not even yourself. Work on being happy and loving yourself. That's the most important thing to do. The rest will fall into place.

Whatever you decide to do, know you have a friend in Ohio who cares about you! emoticon

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LIVE_AMAZINGLY 2/27/2013 6:11PM

    The change has too come from within. No-one can do it for you, but we are all here to support you in your journey. When you're ready you will succeed.

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LIVINGFREE19 2/27/2013 4:06PM

    That would be sad to see you leave.
I really hope you keep trying. This is a hard battle to fight, but it is so worth it, and so are you!

Big emoticon

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JULIAMOONCHILD 2/26/2013 8:18PM

    Hiya!

I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU .... BUT I DON'T WANT YOU TO LEAVE!!! HONESTLY!!! DON'T LEAVE!!!!

My gosh, you gotta take a look around ya and realize that you are NOT alone. We all struggle (OK, a LOT of us struggle) here at Spark with diet, exercise, LIFE, not seeing anything positive happening at times, seeing others succeeding when we are not, seeing others running marathons and thinking WTH are you doing on Spark People, and so on and so on. But the thing is, you don't have to be here in a positive mood all the time. My goodness, you don't even have to be handing out praise every day of the week to others - Like, we all take breaks from spark every now and then for various reasons and it is simply understood, or at least hoped, that the person who is absent is only absent for a short time and will be back when time allows, or the mind allows.

Think of this as a home away from home. No, better yet, think of this as a place of unconditional love (not all of us find that at home)! The thing is, no one here who is worthy of being your friend will ever think less of you because of how your program is going when it's not going, if ya know what I mean.

You say, "or do I continue, knowing nothing will change?" and I say, Continue until change comes when it's good and ready to come ... and then continue onward because you will know then just how wrong you were for thinking that change would never come."

OK, my comment is waaay too long - Sorry!
But how about staying just because someone who doesn't even know you (yet), someone whose been here for a hundred years trying to lose 20 stinkin' pounds, who knows that having my buddies supporting me in more areas than just weight loss, (heck, I rarely even blog about weight loss) is something I won't find out there in the PERFECTLY real world.

Stay ... and be yourself, whoever yourself is on any given day. emoticon

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POSITIVEPAULA8 2/26/2013 5:44AM

    Never ever give up and quit! I do not track so you don't HAVE to track. I used to track but definitely found myself if I were to track I too probably would not be here. I do track my water, fitness, goals in teams i am a member of etc... Just do not track all the food I eat.

Spark people is made so you can do it any which way you like and there is no right or wrong way to do spark people. You have to join teams that interest or will benefit you for you. If you want to leave them leave them and find others that more suited to you and your needs and ones that have goals you want to achieve or participate in.

Re change your background picture perhaps reset your goals fitness and others perhaps changing things around will give your renewed energy to continue. There are lots of people who would like to see you stay and achieve everything you need to achieve and everything your heart desires weight loss and others.

Take care Paula emoticon emoticon


Comment edited on: 2/26/2013 5:48:55 AM

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PROT358 2/26/2013 12:07AM

    Oh I hope you don't leave! You are such an encourager. I think that while you may perceive yourself as a failure that your sparkfriends don't, or at least I don't. And if you do see yourself as a failure you need to somehow reevaluate yourself and learn to celebrate your successes. It might be good to reflect on all you have accomplished and how much you have changed. While I don't know you well, this might be more a mental obstacle than a physical one.

Comment edited on: 2/26/2013 12:10:48 AM

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SPARKFRAN514 2/25/2013 10:00PM

    Its a choice you need to make for your self . like you say when you stay the same weight for months its discouraging and telling you you didn't have a gain is not always helpful. i feel that way when scales keeps bouncing back and fourth like this week Friday 163 to 167.8 emoticon
I will miss you and miss sending the thought and quotes I find
I like what cookie told you.. I took a vacation at Christmas time so from that experience know it would not work for me.
emoticon

We need to do what works for us
. can you talk this over with your boy friend and get his view point. If you chose to leave please drop by my page and say good bye
emoticon


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NETSUE64 2/24/2013 6:54PM

    I would be very sad if you were to quit. You were my first Spark buddy and I remember all the encouragement we shared in the beginning. I understand however that we only have so much time to spend in our lives, and if this isn't bringing you happiness then it's hard to spend that time here.

I think you have come a long way and made some great changes! I remember the first time you posted that you had done squats and were so proud! You have come a long way since then.

Good luck buddy!

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MARIANNE9855 2/24/2013 3:51PM

    I understand if you want ,maybe you should take a break. It helps me to read other people's stories but I have only been on 2 months. I was also very ready after feeling so unhealthy and a prisoner of my body. Maybe try taking measurements and that will be a motivator or making another goal for exercise and don't worry about the food. I may be rambling and not helpful but to me sparkpeople is a priceless resource.

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MARIANNE9855 2/24/2013 3:51PM

    I understand if you want ,maybe you should take a break. It helps me to read other people's stories but I have only been on 2 months. I was also very ready after feeling so unhealthy and a prisoner of my body. Maybe try taking measurements and that will be a motivator or making another goal for exercise and don't worry about the food. I may be rambling and not helpful but to me sparkpeople is a priceless resource.

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LADYVOLSFAN1954 2/24/2013 11:20AM

    Please don't quit! I know how you feel! Just take a break from it all.

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COOKIE_AT_51 2/24/2013 6:25AM

    Hope that you stay ... maybe the week away from tracking and such is what you needed? I once had a diet coach that wrote the words "pause that refreshes" on my weight tracking card when I had hit zero movement in 2 weeks. I still remember that and it has stuck with me.

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68ANNE 2/23/2013 6:31PM

    Please do not quit. I feel the same as you, sometimes. Yes I have lost weight but for months now it has been the same and I spend so much time supporting people and some never thank me. Getting it out will help. I stay, knowing that while I may not be doing everything I can for me, maybe I am making a difference. Alright, I eat better and move more, too.

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KARRENLYNN 2/23/2013 5:31PM

    Hi Dar,

It's you're decision to leave or stay. I can only share some things I've learned. I've learned that if I view this as a lifestyle change and not a temporary project, then it's ok if the scale doesn't move steadily downward. As an admitted scale slave, that's not to say that the current plateau I'm on after a 40 lb loss isn't totally frustrating! I actively look for NSV's, like reduced medications, more energy, or the one I found today - I can finally sit with my legs crossed without holding them in place! Even tho the scale isn't moving, your body is still improving.

I've also received much from this site. Lots of great information and much positive support from people here that I don't always get from my offline friends because they have similiar goals and issues.

I hope this helps you. Good luck no matter what your decision is. Have a great weekend!

Karen emoticon

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HANDYV 2/23/2013 5:09PM

    Yes, I know it can be frustrating. But stick around - you may get a SPARK one day. Tracking is NOT required only recommended. There is always something new here. I have not been as successful as I would like and I too have thought about leaving or cutting back on my time here anyway. But I remain - if you need to take a break but PLEASE comeback. emoticon

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MSKIZ69 2/23/2013 5:04PM

    Please do not quit-yes it can be frustrating to not see daily changes but the scale is a liar to begin with anyway. It doesn't measure muscle tone, flexibility, better blood pressure and sugars...don't leave Spark when we are here to support you at ALL stages.

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