So, I feel I did really well eating this week. I didn't get as much exercise as I wanted to because of the weather and the kids' schedules, but I did manage to burn my goal Monday through Thursday. Friday is where I felt the guilt. I did great all day and then at the end of the day, my dinner was fine but I decided to have a little sweet- yogurt covered pretzels. I start thinking, "How am going to track 4 pretzels? Where is the nutritional info on this container? Should I just guess? Gosh, those are so good! I'm just going to have- what I think- is a full serving. Oh well, going over my calories by a couple hundred for one day is fine. Should I just make this a 'free meal' and have whatever I want? What else do we have around here that I've been depriving myself of? I might as well have a glass of wine too." Then, I find some Hershey Kisses and a small York and have those too. Then it is getting late and the whirlwind in my head is making me crazy. I'm also thinking "You better track everything you are eating to the best of your ability! What have you done? You are throwing off your deficit for the day- and now the week! You might as well forget the whole weekend and eat whatever and start over Monday. You blew it! What should I make for breakfast? Carbs! Carbs! Carbs! Make something really good since you've been depriving yourself."
I eventually drifted off to sleep and woke up this morning wondering if I should make the good (carb loaded breakfast) or maybe I'll correct the damage done last night by eating very little today. No, first I'm going to track everything I ate last night and see just how bad the damage was. It turns out that it wasn't that bad. I'm sitting here at 10:00a.m. Saturday morning and have only had a cup of coffee. Putting all of these words down have made me feel so much better. I was always so afraid of putting my thoughts out there for fear of embarrassment. Well, I know that I'm not the only one who goes through this so I'm using this as my "therapy."
Thank you all for "listening." I feel better now and I'm going to eat a healthy breakfast and take it one meal at a time. I'm hungry!