So two of my three kids came down with stomach flu yesterday. the pukes started at 3AM with my four year old, and then my 6 year old started puking at school at 10AM. No one wanted to use a bowl, only four pukes made it 100% into either a bowl or toilet. Normally my kids are pretty good about using a bowl or toilet but MAN.
So the stage was set for a binge...no time to prepare food yesterday, no DESIRE to prepare food (as all I could think about was barf being in my food), sleep deprivation, and feeling low/depressed/anxious.
My dearest husband came home from work and announced "order pizza, these are extenuating circumstances."
Now, I agreed with him, and I did make a decent choice for the pizza (multigrain thin crust, chicken/chorizo/green pepper pizza totalling 190 calories per slice) but the problem is, I don't know whether to count last night as a binge. I felt a BIT out of control. I tracked my pizza as soon as it was ordered (two slices medium with five chicken wings) but then I had that extra slice...and then after dinner I still wanted my evening sweet treat (1/4 cup of brookside dark chocolate goji raspberries)
So was this a binge? my calories were over (almost 1900, tops of range is about 1600). I got on the elliptical after dinner as I hadn't exercised yet and I tried REALLY hard to not feel guilty about the dinner but my emotions DID get involved.
I started the negative self talk "you know you can't handle ordering pizza, you just triggered the end of your success" "your downward spiral starts now" you will never stay on track tomorrow or in the future" "now it will be another week before you see a loss on the scale".
Today I feel a bit more level headed, I mean really? I was about 400 calories over my usual. In the "olden days" a day like this would have warranted a trip to walmart to buy a jumbo bag of faux jelly bellies and a 2lb bar of chocolate to share with DH after we polished off a tray of nachos. So OLD PRIMA would have eaten nachos for dinner (let's be cautious and estimate 1000 calories although I am SURE it was typically more, especially with my beloved queso as well as melted full fat cheddar) then about 500 calories minimum of JBs and then about 800 calories of chocolate. So that would have been an additional 2300 calories, NO LIE.
So here lies the problem, do I consider last night a success because I only went over by a couple hundred? I mean, that's real life, right?
BUT....I felt out of control. THAT is NOT OK.
so basically I don't know how to feel about yesterday. Am I being too much of a perfectionist? How do I let it go and move on? Does anyone have any strategies for these unexpected "extenuating circumstances" days?