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16 Words I Need To Share

Thursday, February 21, 2013

"Be as decent to yourself as you are to others and stop sabotaging your wonderful success."

I've been searching like someone continuously changing the channels (streams of thought) and not being able to lock on to something positive or productive. Yesterday, before I summoned the focus to blog again, I was emotionally paralyzed. Trapped, a Bipolar/ADHD - hypermanic mind at 200 mph, unable to lock on to a positive "station" in my brain. While writing my last blog did help, it wasn't until I read SPATTERS3's comment which included those 16 words above, one sentence. It is a perfectly composed reality check for someone with a brain wired like mine. It was what I needed to hear at the precise moment I needed to hear it.

I was so distracted by life - which kept throwing hurdle after hurdle, crisis on top of crisis that I lost track of taking care of me! Last year at this time I was a limping time-bomb, pushing 350lb, my life became important to me when my blood pressure scare started my fast track to VSG surgery - but that's not enough. God called Mom home January 2007, at that point, I lost my main support system, my best friend, my "Pally." The following five years I was just lost - suicidal, my life had lost it's purpose, I no longer felt connected to the rest of the world. That was then...

Why bring this up? Because I learned from it that we all need positivity, affirmation, and the love and companionship of others which allows us to know for certain, that our lives matter to more than just ourselves. Isn't that what makes us human? A touch, hug, embrace, smile, a long talk with my Dad about stuff he's told me a hundred times before - but I wasn't listening then. Dad, I am listening to you now. I will get to Florida soon...

So from this I have decided that I shall set forth and remind myself of just how far I have come - and all the things that I overcame just so I could be here in this moment to write this blog to you. It often feels that I am just reading what my hands are typing - there's more than me at work here - He's working through me, with me, for me. God has never given up on me, why should I not follow his example?

I'm going to spend the weekend doing things that remind me of just how much has changed in ten short months. My new body, knee, and mindset are still works in progress - but I win every day that I stay in the moment of each gift of today that I have here on earth. I need to remind myself that I wrote this years ago to someone I love very much -

"You are the birth in every sunrise and the peace in every dawn."

I'm going to repeat this in my mind over and over, but this time, I will be speaking to myself." Give yourself some credit "Sprink" - your life matters to more people than you will ever know..... The real lesson here is that what we do, how we honestly share our journeys - allows us to see for ourselves just how much we matter to others. How much a few words, one sentence, or even ten paragraphs can change so much...for so many... Re-read comments people have left you on your blogs, toot your own horn for a change, re-affirm your place in the world, and learn something about yourself in the process.

I can be this happy again -

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
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    1330 days ago
    Thank you all (collectively) for your comments of support, wisdom, experience and sharing of yourself unselfishly. SparkPeople has given me a voice, a sense of purpose, and perhaps the greatest gift of all, in addition to your love, SparkFriends have reminded me that my life, my journey matters to more people than I ever realized. I hope you enjoy my next blog - which is dedicated to each and every one of you - My SparkFriends, my comforters, cheerleaders, motivators and my most knowledgeble - cherished, and inspirational friends. My working title for the next blog is "The Best Of Spark (by Sprink)" - know that you've given me the courage to be this honest, open, and vulnerable, and have helped me grow in ways mere words cannot easily express, but I will try....
    If you haven't seen this old blog of mine, it's worth a look if you have the time, and my new blog should be posted within 24 hours...Please join me in a celebration of all that WE have and will accomplish though the magic of Spark.


    Your friend - "Sprink"

    1331 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/4/2013 5:55:05 AM
    I am on the eve of RNY surgery and ran across your blog. Your words are so touching and inspirational...thank you!
    1333 days ago
    This matches a mantra that I learned from a life coach. "Treat yourself as gently as you would a precious friend." It is a great phrase that stops me in my tracks when I start down a path of negative self-talk. I would never in a million years treat a friend, or even a stranger that way! It doesn't mean that I'm not accountable for my choices and actions; it means that I can move on if I make a mistake.
    1333 days ago
    What a great lesson. Well said! Thank you!
    1335 days ago
    Thank you for this wonderful blog. So happy for you!! You are peeling the onion!
    1340 days ago

    What a great picture of you as a little boy! It was great to chat with you today. I got my computer sent off.

    Your blog is just as great as always. I like the way you write and think. Those are 16 words are powerful. I know you said you didn't write them. That's okay!! They are good words. I am sorry you have been through so much!! I lost my Mom in 2003. I can truly understand your grief. My Dad passed 3 years ago. It is hard to think about losing loved ones. We are all growing older in my family including me.

    Thanks for helping me through my rough patch this winter. Nice to know you and my other Spark Friends are there for me.
    1342 days ago
    Thank you for these words from your heart. I predict you will find greater joy than that expressed in that (absolutely adorable!) picture. Joy goes hand-in-hand with the peace that passes understanding, coming from the Father above - SO much better than mere happiness!
    YOU, my man, rdaman!
    1342 days ago
  • BOVEY63
    You will be that happy again.
    1342 days ago
    AWESOME Blog, Thank you for posting these emoticon emoticon words emoticon emoticon
    1342 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/21/2013 4:45:27 PM
  • CHERYLL1949
    1342 days ago
    You can do this and positive affirmations are essential for success!
    1342 days ago
    You do matter and the sad part is we never know all those that care for us and receive strength from watching how we deal with our challenges.
    1342 days ago
  • CYND59
    I like that. I just may have to still it for a reminder to myself!
    1342 days ago
    What a great affirmation! Thanks for sharing and sharing what it means to you.
    1342 days ago
    Sprink, what a wonderful photograph! And you (and SPATTERS3) are so right: you can sustain your momentum by remembering the successes you've had and the support you've been given. What you've learned here on SP - and indeed, throughout your life - will stand you in good stead on this journey.
    1342 days ago
    Oh--- that little boy with his stuffed toy shows absolute joy!
    Sprink, go forward in life and recognize your worth--and yes, indeed, toot your own horn! You have so much warmth and wisdom to share. (..and this is what your dear mother would want for you.) May God bless you.
    1342 days ago
    You have definitely come far, Sprink! And you will continue to go farther!
    1342 days ago
    Very thoughtful. You are coming from a very deep place that only life circumstances could have put you in. I would cherish the simplicity of your present outlook. It may not last forever. Glenn
    1342 days ago
    Wonderful blog and wonderful self affirmation. It is always so easy to give praise and compliments to other people but when it comes to ourselves we so often downplay our own success. Congratulations on acknowledging yours and I hope you continue to do so!!
    1342 days ago
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