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    -POOKIE-   177,694
150,000-199,999 SparkPoints

Eve of my 4 year SP anniversary and...

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

... well I find myself pretty much in the same place as this time last year.

Moaning about 40 lbs re-gained and really really struggling to do anything about it.

Yes yes, I have still lost 145 lbs... but I have failed to maintain that. Failed.

I know what to do, I know the rules to keep, the food to eat and the exercise to do.

I just lost my commitment to it.

And still, after wasting a *insert expletive* year I'm not much better off. I'm afraid of being so fat on my wedding day.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MUSHCAT 2/24/2013 11:45AM

    Dear Pookie,
Trying to catch up with all my emoticon s now that my mom has gone home. I, too, am struggling with my commitment to achieving and maintaining a healthy weight. Don't keep beating yourself up. Be kind to yourself and move foward from this very moment knowing that you are fully equipped to meet your goals. emoticon emoticon emoticon Judi

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ROCKMAN6797 2/22/2013 9:58AM

    It is time to recommit Pookie. Think back to when you were 145 pounds heavier. What motivated you to change your lifestyle and lose that weight? Transfer that motivation to something concrete, perhaps your wedding dress, and move forward. You know what has to be done, you just need the motivation to get your there! I know that you have it!

emoticon emoticon

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RAINBOWMF 2/22/2013 9:45AM

    Positive thinking, try to remember how it felt when you first stated to remove your weight, go back to that happy feeling, find it again and move forward.



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KITT52 2/22/2013 9:00AM

    I feel your pain.....don't beat your self are still a good person...don't let your weight rule your world......


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JMHERRING78 2/21/2013 3:41PM

    We all back slide every now and then, and sometimes more than other times. If it makes you down spirited, try to focus that energy into action! For me, I still get down for a bit over what I've gained back, then it makes me mad and I get fired up to head to the gym! And every sweet and fattening food I see just becomes fuel for that fire! (not that I eat them, it just spurs me on to get to the gym and keep going!)
emoticon emoticon

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BOOKWORM27S 2/21/2013 12:27PM

    Congrats on 4 years!

I understand, I'm going on my 11th year of weight management. In that time span... I've had a lot of ups and downs. But please just remember how good it felt in the beginning! I often find inspiration to keep going when I look back on my journey.

Good luck!

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    i haven't been stuck... i have been gaining hand over fist :(
have you thought of using slim fast as a short term weight loss aid before the wedding then go back to healthy eating after? it can help as a short term thing or as a boost to get the scales movng again

good luck

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NEW-CAZ 2/21/2013 9:21AM


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GRANDMABEAST63 2/21/2013 4:59AM

    Yep I know exactly how you feel, you are not alone:) Finding it more difficult to lose the pounds that I have gained....but we can do it !

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ME_HERE_NOW 2/20/2013 10:17PM

    maybe this past year can serve as the rest time you needed to have a renewed commitment, i am trying to do the same under that guise right now. it hurts, it sucks, but only YOU can turn it around. knowing you can do it is great, knowing you have, not so much, but all you can do is push fwd in the positive!!! sending you all my love &good vibes!!! 45 up myself and trying to get my momentum back, i just want you to know you are not alone. this is not a failure, this is the next step to making the lifestyle change permanent.

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WARMSPRINGDAY 2/20/2013 8:30PM

    emoticon my friend. This doesn't change who you are on the inside. You know that. And you haven't failed until you stop trying. I know you haven't stopped trying - I know it! Because you are not a quitter. I understand the frustration, and you know I'm walking with you, still struggling with a 35 pound rebound myself. I don't have pat answers - but then you know there are no pat answers that help. But I know that I care, and I walk this journey with you. And whether you lose or gain, I still walk it with you.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 2/20/2013 6:11PM

    *HUGS* I know you're not looking for "little ms sunshine" to tell you it's all going to get better, but it will. So many say that admitting the problem is the step in the right direction. You've done an amazing job and even though it sucks that you've gained, you are so right... you know what you have to do, and we will all be here to support, just like you've done for all of us. Regardless, you will be a BEAUTIFUL bride. *HUGS*

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MOONMAIDEN1 2/20/2013 4:45PM

    I know how you feel Pookie. I'm in a similar place. I was so close to meeting my goal and then I gained about 40 lbs. Beating yourself up won't help. You are strong and amazing and have been so kind , supportive, encouraging, and non judgmental of other people. Now you just have to be there for you. Good luck, I know you will do awesome! emoticon

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RAINBOWCHOC 2/20/2013 3:45PM

    so sorry to read how down you are today, especially as I am "wiggle dancing". Perhaps I can send some good vibes up the M2 to help you feel better.
Having made such great progress yourself you don't need any cliches or pep talk from me, just a whole lot of understanding that it's been a bad time and "this too shall pass".
Good luck with year 5 and the wedding plans
big hugs

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ALISHAB3 2/20/2013 2:14PM

    Aww, I feel your pain. I've gained 30 of the 80 that I had lost. We can start again. We can do it together!!!! emoticon

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KATHYJO56 2/20/2013 2:06PM

    I know that you aren't happy about the weight gain, but you have not failed. I feel that you are a true success story. I am proud to be your Spark Friend. emoticon

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LEXIE63 2/20/2013 1:42PM

    You are a very pretty lady! And you will be beautiful on your wedding day, even if you are not at the weight you had hoped. Commit to being happy on your wedding day, instead of worrying about what you will weigh then. The people who love you will be there because they love you and are happy for you!
Lex xxx

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MARTY728 2/20/2013 1:32PM

    May I insert some expletives? emoticon

A positive attitude may not solve everything but it makes for a pleasant experience.

I know that you can get back on track. Let all the stress associated with the other stuff in your life go, since it just doesn’t matter! The wedding, the joy of dealing with friends, relatives and life will be there.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KITHKINCAID 2/20/2013 1:30PM

    I know exactly how you feel. Sorry sweetie.

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CHARLOTTE1947 2/20/2013 1:29PM

    We all slide. Don't have a pity party. Move! I've been stuck for a year too. I found the motivation in a trip to France in May. I don't want to be the fat American! It's a race to lose more pounds by May 1st!

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MADTHENURSE 2/20/2013 1:18PM

    Nothing to fear but fear itself.... you can do it!!!

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