I AM Succeeding, Darn It!!!
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
I have spent the past 2 months working hard at losing weight and to adjusting my food habits to keep my newly diagnosed diabetes in check. It can be frustrating to see the scale stay at or about the same place day after day. I feel like I am not getting anywhere. Yet, tonight I am sitting here and realizing I am really doing some remarkable things. I have to put them down here so I can see them and believe that I am really not a failure.
1) On 12/17/12 I had an average fasting glucose of 297; for the past week my glucose has been averaging 121. (100 is "normal") That's an improvement of 176 points in 2 months!!!! WOAH!!! That is something to celebrate. That doesn't just mean that I am watching my meals occasionally, that means I have been maintaining that over time. That is a hard thing to do as a diabetic "newbie".
2) Since being diagnosed, I have been on both oral meds and insulin. I am only taking half of the oral meds because of some side effects. The doctor knows and isn't real happy about it, but she is ok with it. My success from #1 above is on only half the medication that is supposed to help me bring the glucose numbers down. Not only am I working it, I am working it with only half the support of meds.
3) I didn't know this when I first started insulin but most people gain 10-15 pounds in the first month or so on it. I have not only NOT gained the weight, I have kept my weight at the level it was when first diagnosed. I have fluctuated up a pound or two, but I always manage to bring it back down. While this doesn't really help my feel encouraged by a downward trend on the scale, I feel like I have kicked butt and not gone backwards.
4) My two food nemesises (is that even a word??) have been potato chips and McDonalds--especially the fries. I have had neither since 12/18/2012. I have eaten out, I have had tortilla chips, but I have not given in to the two foods that really push me down the slippery slope. Every time I am tempted, I think about breaking my streak and decide that I would rather have my streak than chips or Micky Dee's fries. (Although it has been close a few times!)
In the past week or so I have gotten down on myself because I haven't been more successful at losing weight. I can see now that the weight loss will be even slower than before, but I have made some HUGE steps in improving my health.
For a lot of complex reasons I have not shared my diabetes diagnosis with more than a few people (other than my Spark Friends). I don't want people to treat me with kid gloves of offer "help"--even when I don't need it. This works well in all areas except one--support. I have no one in my day-to-day life that I can share my frustrations and my celebrate my successes. As much as I love my SparkFriends, sometimes I just need a face to face person to offer me words of wisdom, congratulations, and sympathy followed by a big hug. I know it is my choice to keep things quiet, but I can also see how I am missing out. I think this is going to have to be a new short-term goal.
I am through with my ruminating in my tunnel vision bemoaning my lack of progress. I am going to celebrate the incredible things I have done in the past 8 weeks. I am going to step forward with confidence knowing I am headed in the right direction. I am moving forward and I am not going to let setbacks become ruts. I am going to keep succeeding as long as I keep doing what I am doing. Thanks SparkFriends for cheering me on, even when I can't see what there is to cheer for.