A little evil motivator is on my shoulder....
Monday, February 18, 2013
Two weeks of holiday behind me - and 5 new pounds on my behind! I was gonna wait til tomorrow to step on the scale - give myself a couple of days to adjust - but then this morning the scale was looking up at me from the bathroom floor and I decided to just get it over with.... Back up to 205. Crap.
But it was so worth it - we had such a good time away - now its back to reality. Yesterday we went shopping for groceries and picked up lots of fresh fruit and salad stuff. Some chicken and some lean pork for protein. Low fat milk - lots of good choices. It was tough because when my husband comes shopping he tends to want all kinds of stuff - but he agreed on vacation that he has 25 pounds to lose - so I was able to ask him with each extra he wanted to throw in the cart - is that a choice that will help you lose weight? And we scraped away with nothing too scary that was going to enter the house.....
I need to get serious about this weight loss adventure because I promised myself I would drop 50 pounds this year and it is mid February and here I am up 7 pounds from New year's day. so far not so good with following the plan.... I know what I have to do. This calls for hard core Eat To Live program to get things moving... fruits, veggies and beans. Lots of water. I add lean protein like my whey protein shakes, a few ounces daily of chicken or lean pork - because if I don't get that protein I am a starving marvin!
For the next two weeks it is hard core Eat to Live. It has worked well for me in the past - it gets my metabolism moving and my energy up. Its a healthy way to eat and it makes me feel lighter with all that fresh food going through my system.
And its back to the gym. 5 days a week for working out. Treadmill with incline - gotta run more than walk - time to get my butt into gear. It is time for huffing and puffing and red faced workouts - not that middle of the road stuff..... its Bob Harper total body workout time! It's sweat dripping off my nose and soaking through my t shirt time.... It's front crawl in the pool instead of breast stroke.... It's time to shake rattle and roll this body back into Onederland.
It is silly sometimes I think to myself - I know what I need to do to drop weight - it is just sticking to the program more of the time. I think the trick is to just agree with myself to do it for 3 days at a time. That's about my time limit for sticking to anything. Then if 3 days goes good - I'll go for anther 3. Discipline and long term commitments are not my fortay... I have learned that much about myself over the past few years.
I have to stop fooling myself - I have to remember that to be slim and fit I have to eat healthy and keep my body moving. I know that I feel better when I do that. I have to embrace that good feeling and agree with myself that I deserve to be fit and healthy.
And I have a little side bet with my competitive self. I have a friend who had been on a perpetual diet and goes up and down the scale with the same 15 -20 pounds. I have secretly decided (not so secret now that I'm telling all you this..) that I am going to lose my next 15 pounds to get her goat. Isn't that evil of me? Does anyone else have this secret desire to lose that weight just to drive someone else nuts? To make them jealous? It seems so petty but it is in my brain right now.... It is a raw motivation - I want to look great - I want others to say - Holy Crap Sylvia - you've lost weight! We can see it! And I want that scale to be in the one hundreds again.
Phew - I am on a roll - nothing like a little evil motivation to get me going.... I'll take it! I will take anything that is going to edge me forward to losing this poundage. I will take every bit of motivation that makes me want to win this battle - cause believe me - it is a battle for me - I am at war with my fat! I want to get rid of it - I want a normal BMI - I am so tired of being fat! Enough! I say Enough!
Time to deal with this for once and for all.