Day 46 - 16th February 2013 Saturday
Saturday, February 16, 2013
I have been feeling really down lately, and my whole body hurts, especially around my abdominal area, my IBD and Fibro and depression has like joined up forces and teamed up against me, and there are days i feel like i am loosing the battle, if it was just one i could take it on but it has been getting me really down. Despite that i have been doing my best with the challenges i can do, but those that ask to love yourself, or list positive things about yourself i am having a hard time to come around and doing those challenges, i think it will take some time, the packing is coming along, we have someone that will be buying our dryer and someone is willing to buy our television when we leave, he is letting us keep it until we move out the house. Its one of the guys that owns a delicacy food store and we often go there, he does give us some deals on his foods. I am not too fond of it but my husband loves special sorts of salami and such, as i know how that can increase your calories in no time. Well today was a restful day despite all that has been happening in my life and in my mind.
Something about me
Double life, sometimes the person i think i am isn't the person i see in the mirror , sometimes i wish my dreams life was more reality and reality more as dreams, maybe one day i will feel one with myself but right now i feel torned within myself. Hard to explain but i feel like i am 2 people in one body, the person within is alot different than the person that people see, i do act different around people than when i am alone. But i guess maybe more people are like this i don't know. I just wish life was more simple then i would know really who i am.
Viva Forever by Spice Girls
“The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you’re off it.” ~Jackie Gleason