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Hubby's Wisdom and My Birthday Treat

Saturday, February 16, 2013

My hubby had words of wisdom for me today.

We were eating out for lunch and I was explaining something I had figured out as a trigger for my emotional eating. I told him that last night when we had the grandchildren over, he was very attentive to them and I didn't feel needed to help with them. I felt like I wasn't included. This happens whenever the kids are around. I end up eating. Also on weekends when he goes to the computer room to work, I feel like I'm not included and feel left out. So I often turn to food. I think I remember eating as a child when I felt like my mother was busy with my baby brothers, and I felt left out. Also when I was 13, I had some friends tell me I couldn't hang out with them anymore. and you guessed it...I ate. Whenever I tried to figure out what I did or didn't do or what I lacked that made them exclude me, I couldn't figure it out so I turned to food.

So rejection, or feeling excluded or left out, triggers a turn to food.

But when I told my hubby about my theory, he said,"Stop analyzing your reasons for eating. I think you eat because you like to eat. You love food." Well, I had to laugh at that because it is true. He told me I just need to remember that just because I like to eat does not mean I should do it whenever I feel like it. I have to have moderation. He suggests that I am so much more able to avoid excess eating if I am doing something, keeping busy. He said my best bet is to come up with something that I love to do more than I love to eat. I think he has something here. My reasoning is possible, but plain and simple...I love to eat.

So to follow his advice, I decided what I wanted to spend my birthday money on. Craft supplies. I spent an hour online choosing assorted items I can use in the art journal I am working on and things to sew onto my cloth journal I will make. I figure these supplies will come in handy as I get to work on a project or two to take some of my free time off my hands. I also am going to go to Mary Jo's cloth store and get some fabric for a quilt I want to make and for the cloth journal.

So those things should help keep me busier.

Today when I woke up I decided it was the day I wanted to bake something special for my birthday. I wanted cut-out sugar cookies. My son here from Hawaii really likes them, too, so they are a treat for him, too. I ran short of regular flour, and had to substitute about a cup of the 2 1/2 cups flour with wheat flour. I wasn't sure I'd like that. I love my original recipe. They taste good anyway, but the wheat flour makes them more filling. I don't think I can eat as many of them as usual. Which is a very good thing.

My birthday is tomorrow and I picked IHOP as my restaurant to eat at to celebrate. They are very busy on Sunday's so we're going to go in the late afternoon, I hope it isn't so busy then. I like the egg substitute scrambled eggs with turkey bacon and two pancakes with Sugar Free syrup. I don't know why this is such a big treat for me. I just love hot breakfast and never make it for myself. Especially pancakes.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Happy belated Birthday!!!! I would have picked IHOP too-I LOVEEE pancakes. Must'a been nice! emoticon
    1840 days ago
    Happy Birthday!!! I love your Birthday Dinner at IHOP! I think you are on to something with the love of food. New hobbies can really be key to our success. I have taken my sewing back up. I laugh at how much more time I spend on food shopping, prepping and cooking now all while eating so much less! Best Wishes for your Healthiest, Happiest year yet! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1851 days ago
  • JANAMP09
    Hope you enjoyed your birthday breakfast and on figuring out an alternative to eating and keeping busy. I did so like Jodi's point of " Even better than stopping when you're full is to not start eating if you're not hungry"
    I am so guilty of eating when I am not hungry - just out of habit. I think if we all tried to stop this habit we would all be better off.
    1852 days ago
    How right both you and your husband are in my opinion. I love food too. And I know I a.so overeat from emotional triggers. It makes sense we do so eying we love when we are hurting and for many people that is eating sugar. However now that you know you feel bad if you feel left out you can switch to doing something you live that s better for you. For me it means reading and journaling. For you it is crafting. I bet you will make some amazing things
    1853 days ago
  • -AMANDA79-
    Nothing wrong with being able to recognize emotional triggers for eating. But having a plan in place when that happens is also great!
    1853 days ago
  • KANOE10
    I think finding a non food activity that you really enjoy is a great idea. Yet I would not ignore your feelings of being left out. I am glad you told your husband about them.

    Happy Birthday. E emoticon njoy IHOPs.
    1853 days ago
    I love homemade sugar cookies
    1853 days ago
  • _JODI404

    Just my 2cents: I think you are not "over analyzing" your triggers. I think you are right on. In my opinion, hubby is vastly oversimplifying things. It may be true that you love to eat...but I don't think it's the cause of binge eating.

    I remember watching an Oprah episode with her trainer, Bob Greene and she said that she didn't know there were deeper issues... she just thought she really liked food... potato chips.

    Now she says: Even better than stopping when you're full is to not start eating if you're not hungry. "When you go to reach for something in a moment of frustration, anxiety—and for me it's the slightest thing. ... It doesn't have to be something really strong; it's just the slightest little irritation that you feel like a handful of almonds would make things better," Oprah says. "Now to stop myself in that moment that I go to reach for the almond to say: 'Am I really hungry? Why am I reaching for that? What am I really feeling right now?' That has worked wonders for me."

    Once you've realized that it's not necessarily food you're craving, the next step is figuring out what you're hungry for, Oprah says. "[Ask yourself]: 'Do I want somebody to listen to me? Do I want somebody to pay attention to me? Do I want to be heard? Do I want to be validated? What do I really want?"

    emoticon That last paragraph sounds SO similar to the conclusion you reached. I think you are on to something important. Anyhow, I'm not trying to discount your husband's opinion, but rather to validate your deeper reflection and analysis of your food triggers. Just my opinion / take or leave as you like.

    *H*A*P*P*Y* *B*I*R*T*H*D*A*Y*!!!!!!!!!!!!
    R>I hope you have a wonderful, special birthday and enjoy your meal at Ihop!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    1854 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/16/2013 11:53:05 PM
    Congrats on the realizations you came to and your plan to keep busy.

    I hope you have a very special birthday tomorrow!
    1854 days ago
    Sounds like you have a lovely birthday planned!

    I can relate to eating when lonely or left out, and. I love to eat! For me, probably a combination of both is what fuels my over eating.

    Hope you have a nice birthday!
    1854 days ago
  • BEFIT018
    It's good that you figured out your triggers & are taking steps to work through them.

    Have a happy birthday!
    1854 days ago
  • CHERYLA2012
    It's good when a plan comes together. Enjoy your IHOP Birthday treat!

    1854 days ago
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