Why can't I seem to get it all together at once?
I used to think of myself as a powerful person when I really wanted something.
Does my lack of success mean I don't really want this?
I hope not.
I signed up at a new gym end of December, brand new in fact with great equipment and no crowds, though it is getting busier. I also signed up to work with a trainer twice a week. He has taken me from completely out of shape - worse shape of my life - to feeling like I can be strong again with work.
I've also tried out some of the classes and found some that I really enjoy. Spinning and shockingly a Zumba class that doesn't use all traditional Zumba music.

I've set 3 fitness goals:

Savin Rock 5K on 3/23
Jog with Judy 5K on 5/4
Bloomin' Metric Charity bike ride on 6/2 (which is my birthday weekend)

That is all the easy part.

Food is my challenge. I could cry when I think about food. I have a lot of issues with my stomach again. I am on medicine that just makes it much worse and I feel my body getting sicker and sicker. I don't even want to eat. I just eat because my stomach will hurt and I will vomit if I don't.

I want a do over button!!!

Well it doesn't exist and the only person who can fix this is me! So I need to get out of the self pity funk I'm in and take it one day, one meal at a time.

I am sitting down and planning out a weeks menu based on the foods I can tolerate.

I have been at the same weight since about two weeks after starting with the trainer. I lost 6 lbs and now fluctuate between 1-2 lbs in either direction but going nowhere.

My goals this week:

1. Drop one new lb beyond those first 6
2. Plan meals and stick to the plan, including eating every three hours using a timer.
3. Drink 8 glasses of water a day.