The long and short of it:

I'm planning a vacation. I invited a friend and in turn a friend invited 2 more people...and didn't tell me until I commented about it (I found out through the other 2). I feel like the vacation I was planning for me was hijacked :-(

Out of this group of 4, I'm the heaviest. I know that everyone has reasons for why they weigh what they do and I'm not judging.

I worked out every single day. I delivered our local paper with my dad and we speed-walked our way through it and got a route that took, on average, 2 hours down to just over an hour and 15 minutes. We were always looking for ways to become more efficient! The route started with 7 days a week and then the Sunday paper was axed, so it moved to 6.

Monday to Friday when I finished the route, the guy I was seeing and I would head to the gym together and work out.

When we split up, I internalized and couldn't figure out what was wrong with me and stopped working out. When it all boils down my thoughts were "why should I care?" 70lbs later, I finally figured it out. I need to care because no one else will.

After some much needed "couch therapy" with a friend, I realize that it isn't me there was a problem with, it was him!

Back to this vacation. These other girls border from anorexic to exercise-obsessed, all of which I know isn't healthy.

There was a bit of a fiasco yesterday when it came to planning the flights and it really ticked me off.

I wanted to be healthy before the trip and I've done so-so with my eating. This just served as motivation! I've decided to put all of my frustration into working out and being healthy.

I have a friend who will be keeping me accountable. I've given her all the information she needs in order to be able to do her "job"

No more putting others and their happiness first. From now on, it is about me and my health.

Today is the first day of the beginning of my life.