Day 46 What a day
Saturday, February 16, 2013
My trainer pissed me off today. :) I'm not the kind of person that usually gets irritated at the gym--I"m willing and able to try just about anything, and give my best effort at it. I notice that I REALLY don't like being on uneven ground, though...and guess what we did today? :) Bosu ball. UPSIDE DOWN bosu squats. That stupid thing is impossible to get on and off of alone. So for a little while, his nickname was a lot less pleasant than 'yoda'. (in my head, I never call him the nicknames out loud lol) Otherwise things were good--shoulder is still tender, but much better than earlier this week. Maybe the physio guy does know what he's doing..... :).
I also dropped my brand new smartphone, to the tune of $400 to fix it. SOMEbody is making a fortune on that--400 for a piece of frickin' glass? Really? I guess the lesson learnt here is...protect the phone in 10 layers of bubble wrap lol. Grrr. And I have no one to be mad at except myself. Bah. Since I was already in a money throw-away mood, I decided to renew my gym membership plus my trainer fees as well. Yay fun! (insert sarcasm here) I only have to work for 4.5 months at my 3rd job to pay it all off.....sigh.
Oh...and then DH tells me he has a new job. WTF? Just like that. So after several months in job heII, it looks like he finally gets to do what he's trained to do. Thank GOD. I really think I would have divorced the person he was becoming in this thankless and soul sucking job. Not really, but it will be really nice to see him happy again. Yay! And all because I spontaneously decided to email a resume even though the ad said 'fax only'.
So...a pretty emotional roller coaster-y day. And still I did not eat over it. Who am I and what I have I done with the real Mar???? How do I figure out exactly WHAT triggered this? Hmm.
Actually--I suppose I have DH's crappy job to thank for it, in a roundabout way. I just kept thinking that maybe he would be less tired and lethargic if he were at least eating properly. I couldn't fix the main problem, but that...that was something I COULD do. So went out and bought a bunch of healthy stuff. The healthy stuff also extended to me...being full on a yummy chipotle pepper chicken sammich and a strawberry banana 'split' (sans ice cream) doesn't leave much room for anything else.
Okay, so the physical part, I get. What happened with the mental part, though? What stopped me? Is the mental/emotional part more directly influenced by what I'me ating than I realize? Or was the act of working out, and taking further steps (trainer) to keep working out in a better manner--was that the beginning of building a foundation that I didn't even realize was there? Just quietly plugging along in little bits and pieces--those little bits and pieces added up to something---something FAR bigger. The sum of the whole became greater than the sum of the parts.
Maybe this is how that whole 'put out into the universe what you want back' works. It's a little freaky-deaky.
Funny, I used to think like this a lot (bigger picture and forces in the universe and all that); then Skye kitty died and I stopped. Or maybe I stopped before that. I don't know. It's been a long time since I've felt that sense of something else or something 'bigger than', at any rate.
Ebb and flow. Funny how life works.