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The Road to Mental Health is a Slippery Slope to Climb - Again.

Friday, February 15, 2013

I've had a relapse with the depression. It's been brewing for a couple of months.
I'm back on anti-depressants and have a temporary med to help me sleep.
Now to find a GP Psychoanalyst practitioner. They are covered by our Health Plan. Unless you have the money or private insurance - and I don't - Psychoanalysts charge - a lot. The ones that are covered by our government medical plan are few and far between and I have to be referred by my family doctor. At least knowing that I'm doing something positive helps me stay steady most of the time.
The biggest thing that keeps going through my mind is why am I like this? There are so many people that are and have gone through so much both physically and mentally and yet seem to be content with their lives and yet here I am feeling so sorry for myself for things that happened to me as a child and young adult. I have a wonderful husband, great children who have made me proud and 6 healthy grandchildren who are doing well.
I don't even understand myself. How could anyone else? NO, I'm not suicidal and would never entertain it. That is not the kind of legacy I would leave.
Thanks for letting me vent.
My prayers for you is that you go around the corner and see the light at the end of the tunnel. I've been there often, I just can't seem make it entirely out of the tunnel.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Oh - I feel for you! It seems when you start talking about these issues, you find out how very common they are. Very. You are not alone. One of the best cures is being with people -- make yourself interact. Also movement. Whether you feel like it or not, get out and move. A walk or a swim or whatever trips your trigger -- it helps so, so much!
    1855 days ago
    emoticon We're all here for you, Janine.
    1855 days ago
  • LYNCHD05
    Janine you are so brave being able to talk about this so openly. I was thinking about you today and there you showed up on the daily chat. You have lots of friends rooting for you. Feel good very soon!!!!! Sending lots of hugs!
    1855 days ago
  • 1EMMA2011
    I can completely relate. Depression is anger turned inward they say. You are not alone. Good for you for getting therapy.

    1856 days ago
  • VOLARI52
    My prayers are that at one point in your life you will be free of this burden.... emoticon
    1856 days ago
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