I have been sitting around the house all week and not doing anything but that is going to change starting tomorrow. I am going to get up at 6 am my time and wait until 6:30 am to get my young son up for school and get him and I breakfast. At 7 am I will get him down to the bus stop and wait with him until the bus comes. After he gets on the bus and leaves for school I will go for a walk around the block if my legs can handle it.

When I get back I am going to start cleaning house then doing a few loads of laundry and then doing about an hours worth the workouts using my 3, 5 and 10 lb weights. I will also use my exercise balls. I want to build my upper body along with the muscles in my legs. If I can keep this up each day I will feel better and it will help keep the weight off even though I feel like I gained about 5 lbs back.

I will eat lunch the start back at it and even try and go for another walk around the block hopefully. I want to do this for me and me only and no matter what no one will ever stop me and tell me that I dont need to lose weight. I wantto be able to fit into my size 10 jeans again and feel good about myself.

When dinner time comes I will watch what I eat and how much I eat because lately I have been eating way to much and that is not good for me. I have been feeling depressed and lonely lately and I know that I shouldn't but I do. My mum and dad has told me that if I want this bad enough then just go for it and that is exactly what I am going to do because I want to be happy again and see myself 3 months down the road weighing below 200 lbs and come hell or high water I will get there even if it kills me.

I don't ever want to feel like this again and I know its my fault that I am like this because I listen to too many people and what they tell me I should do but no more. I am only going to listen to my Spark friends and my heart. My heart is telling right now that I am doing the right thing by posting this blog and how I feel about my weight.

I am going to keep working at it no matter what I Susan Walsh want to lose this weight and feel great about myself again and to be able to look in a mirror a few months down the road and see the weight coming off and work hard to keep it off