Wednesday, February 13, 2013
It seems I am losing steam mentally and sorta physically… I am not anywhere near giving up I am just not so on it like I was when I started, I guess it is all very exhausting as I am moving so I don’t feel like I have the time to exercise (which I know is a big fat excuse) also my mom has been sick so I have been going to her house and last minute having to figure something out for everyone for dinner to help out, at this point I am starving so it is a recipe for disaster! Usually she is well and has either already made dinner and if it is something I feel isn’t calorie friendly I just take my kids home and eat a sensible dinner but being hungry, stressed, tired and last minute has been killing my calories in the evening maybe I should eat a lean cuisine before I leave work so I have had my dinner before I get there and will have no desire for eating as I cook for them.
I did manage to make myself do my cardio weight training Monday night… the idea was MWF do cardio core strength training but last week I failed horribly at it so I pushed it this week and even though I didn’t want to do it I made myself and felt great about it but last night I was supposed to do cardio and just couldn’t get myself to do so.. I think I have hit a mental block with exercise and I am not sure how to break it other than just make myself do it. Like Zumba I know deep down I love dancing but for whatever reason I just can’t get myself to do it.. I wish I knew how to get myself out of this mental exercise block I am in. I seriously think I am my own worst enemy sometimes yikes! I am doing pretty good on the food/calorie front (of course buckling down always helps) but for the most part I can work easily with calorie counting it’s this stupid mental attitude towards exercise that is really bugging me. I hope this funk will pass and I will enjoy it again.
I think I keep thinking that once I move and things are a little easier I will be suddenly way into working out but I know right now would be the best to push myself to show me that things will always come up and take my time and I will always try to put me last so I feel I need to push myself even if I am counting down the minutes so that I know I can work through impossible schedules and I am important to take care of too.