Tuesday, February 12, 2013
I HAVE A COMPLETE GRASP ON THE FACT THAT LIFE IS NOT FAIR. SO PLEASE, QUIT TRYING TO TEACH ME THAT LESSON.
Could you also please stop giving us Mondays?
Hello Monday. Today is a good day to recommit to being sober and sane. My journey to the skinny me was interrupted by all sorts of excuses, like holidays, trips home, moving and all sorts of other ridiculous things life throws at us. Well, I am not a quitter. So life, put that in your pipe and smoke it!
This morning I woke up with pain in my shoulder so bad it brought tears to my eyes. I must have pulled a muscle. Anyway, it reminded me of how my mom used to always say to "offer pain up in penance for ones sins". (she was such a good Catholic) To her suffering was a blessing, a gift, like money in your pocket to pay for sins. So maybe she was on to something. If we have to hurt, why not get something for it…like redemption. In thinking of it that way, it does become more tolerable. Maybe God has given mankind a certain prescribed dosage of pain each day (complements of Adam and Eve) and he just sprinkles it on us like salt and pepper. Maybe today is my turn to pay some dues. Anyway, Mom, if your reading this in heaven, two things; First, Isn’t there something more interesting to do? Secondly, is Dad there? No, I’m kidding. Of course he is. Just a little chuckle. (Mary got it.) No,seriously... secondly, I ask for faith in me. Fat people are good people who just are not thinking clear about what’s good for them.
Anyway, today is is a wonderful day to be alive and I feel confident that my higher power is with me. This weekend I recommitted to a group I used to belong to called OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS. It’s a very successful group of strong people who share their strength and hope with each other through phone calls, meetings, and literature. It’s nothing like a diet club. They don’t talk about food and restricting calories. They focus on a higher power to use to seek will power. It resonates with me totally. As I have all the information about how to eat right. I totally get the calories-in verses calories-spent equation. I think most fat people do. We are not idiots, right? We just are folks who can justify our indulgences with all kinds of excuses. Believe me, I am the queen of justifying a chocolate addiction as if it were a narcotic.
Well, today I am going to be conscious of what I put in my mouth and seek my higher power for a little help here. Today I am 218 pounds of woman. Actually, two women…a skinny one wearing a fat one over her like a big overcoat. And it’s going to suck when summer gets here. Love you all.
(excerpt from firstname.lastname@example.org