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Day 1: Baby steps continue

Monday, February 11, 2013

Today started out poorly then turned into something very good. I'm crediting the exercise with that turnaround!

I not only signed up for Spark Coach to stay on track (and it's fun so far, by the way), but I also signed up for the January Jump Start (I love that you can begin any time you want, January or not!). Today, I completed the 10-minute video and added 20 minutes of erging. I realize the program calls for 30 minutes of cardio a day, but I'm a little out of shape and, furthermore, don't want to get caught up in the compulsiveness nightmare I found myself in last time. So I went into the cardio with a target of 20 minutes, and that's all I allowed myself. I felt VERY GOOD at the end of the rowing session!

In other news, my mom is sick. She started throwing up late yesterday afternoon and was still experiencing intermittent vomiting today. As a daughter and a nurse, this concerns me. My mom is 79 years old and lives independently, but I'm her primary caregiver.

The illness perhaps turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I don't spend much time at my mom's because she spends a lot of time at my house. She comes over every afternoon around 2pm, and we enjoy some TV before I cook dinner for all of us. Then she goes home. We also do our shopping together during the week and little things like that. So, the inside of her condo is fairly foreign to me.

Today, when Mom called to say she was feeling too ill to come over this afternoon, I set my work aside and went to her instead. What an eye-opener.

Because she's fiercely independent and had been telling me she was managing on her own just fine, I was not prepared for the magnitude of, well, grime in her house.

It's clear she no longer cleans at all. Her kitchen was a horror (which I quickly put to rights), and her bathroom also was extremely dirty. Needless to say, I felt like a terrible daughter for not knowing of this (even though, realistically, I realize it's not my fault).

After I fished an old dishrag out of her garbage disposal (!!), which was so furry with mold it creeped me out, I realized I need to step up big time and get her living situation back under control.

So, I'm going to cut back my work hours a little bit (a privilege of being self-employed) and spend each Tuesday afternoon at Mom's house, doing her dishes (her dishwasher dates to about 1980 and does a terrible job), cleaning her bathrooms, and generally providing her with a clean and sanitary living environment. I'll also go on Saturdays to do her laundry and other housework.

This decision made me breathe a big sigh of relief. I think in the back of my mind I knew my mom was faltering, but I wasn't ready to face it. Well, the reality faced me today, and I won the stare-down.

I feel so privileged to care for my mom in her old age. And I'm glad to be exercising regularly and eating healthy foods again so that I have the physical and emotional stamina for what's to come.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JOANNKW 2/12/2013 1:55PM

    How lovely you are to recognize the problem and step up to deal with it. Facing our loved one's infirmities is not easy.

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FLAMENM 2/11/2013 11:44PM

    It's hard when we realize the ones who raised us need the favor returned. I'm glad you can help out your mom.

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KJP2013 2/11/2013 8:18PM

    Sounds like you had an inspiring day...great job on your baby step successes!
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