Monday, February 11, 2013
I really enjoy sharing and being creative on these Blogs but today is a down day for me!
First my special NC sister's husband died 3 weeks ago and she needs me so much! We can't talk on the phone because she is crying so hard! And I can't go.
And about an hour ago my oncologist called because he is scheduling an emergency appointment following a CT scan for tomorrow when all had been going so well!
Momma said there would be days like this but now I wonder...
Right now I feel so much! And so much is ugly! I question why and wonder why I am so weak and why I can't be in two places at once...I want to be whole but wonder if that will ever happen again...and I want to blame something and there is nothing there.
It will be a long 24 hours until the clinic and I learned a long time go about a 1200 mile separation. But tomorrow when the air clears the way, I will be able to stop and think and when something is known, I know that I can handle it... that it is just the not being there and it is the not knowing!
But in the meantime why can't we stop it...