Every so often, I come out of my fog and things seem to click. The last time that happened was when I imagined a half pound of fat melting off my body, flowing down into a bottomless hole like the Grand Canyon, where it would never be able to make it back up onto my body again. That visualization has stayed with me.
Today, I packed up 44.5 + pounds:
Each black bag from my EZ up tent has two 10-pound dumbbells for a total of 40 pounds. Then I added a 2 pound zumba stick to each for a total of 44 pounds. I figure the bags weighed close to the extra half pound needed.
I had the thought that I would attempt to carry them around the block. I didn't make it out the driveway carrying the 45 pound packs. And then I put them in the wheeled box and couldn't get it up and over the hose.
So I said, "No WONDER I was so fatigued! No WONDER it was so difficult to get me out of my recliner and moving on down the street to the pool!!
No WONDER I feel better than I have since 1995.
In fact 1985 was a milestone year and I can remember what I was able to do, how much energy I had then. I taught school, played the organ at a church, sang with a quartet, directed a Sweet Adelines Chorus, and prepared and led them through their first show AT CHRISTMAS TIME, and also took them to competition with all the rehearsing, choreography, costuming . . .
I wouldn't want to do all that again AND work at the same time, but I'm close to thinking that I could do it. When I reach the current short term goal weight (scheduled for April 1) I will be at the same weight I was in 1985.
I wonder how I'll feel physically then, NOT having to carry around the 50 pounds I was carrying last July?