My life can be defined into periods of food, I suppose. The first solid food I ever ate, the apology foods my parents thought made up for their neglect and abuse, the food I learned how to cook because the babysitter couldn't and someone had to feed us kids. Food has always been my comfort, my go-to security, and I've paid for it. At 24, I am 5'10" and I weigh 260 lbs., which is qualified as obese. I don't look "obese." Definitely overweight, but I wear it better than others would because of my height. But I can't do much without having to catch my breath, and I know how unhealthy I am.
I have a good job, but I am sitting almost the entire 8 hours of work every day, rarely having to walk up and down the few stairs that are here. I have an amazing relationship. Blair makes me want to be a better person, even though he accepts me for whatever I look like and whomever I am. He wants to get married again and have kids (not necessarily with me, but that's the direction we're heading in), and I have always promised that I would lose weight and develop healthier eating and exercising habits before I ever got pregnant or had kids. In one year (and some odd days), I will be 25, a quarter of a century old. It's about time I grow up and get my life in order.
I'm finally finishing my International Business degree after being out of Penn State for 3 1/2 years and out of high school 5 1/2. I finished classes and finally re-enrolled at Behrend and put in my intent to graduate. I got a letter from the registrar this week saying I've completed all my classes, so I'm finally done. I'm just waiting on my diploma. This was my first "Birthday Resolution." I don't make New Year's Resolutions. They always seem to be set up to fail. I make "birthday" resolutions. Things like, by my next birthday, I'll do blah blah blah. In this case, my resolutions start with "By my 25th birthday." The first is: by my 25th birthday, I will finish my International Business degree and finally be finished with my undergrad degrees. Well, mission accomplished! I'm not even 24 yet (4 days) and I've accomplished my first goal for the year!
My second resolution is to be "debt-free" by my 25th birthday (give or take a month). Now, this does NOT count my student loans, which I will be struggling with probably until I'm well over 30. This is my credit card debt, which is the only other debt I have. I'm not sure yet if it includes the money I owe my dad (about $2,200), but it should. Dad has been so good to me and so understanding and forgiving. He deserves to be free of MY debt. That being said, however, on top of that, I have $515 to pay off of my First Merit credit card, $1600 on my Lane Bryant credit card, $3500 on my Best Buy credit card, and over $6000 on my Capital One credit card. I've gotten myself in WAY over my head in the last year or two, and I'm suffering for it. I'm hoping with this tax return, I can at least get caught up on all those bills (which I've ignored paying for a while) and start getting ahead of myself in order to pay them off. If those were my only expenses, it would be easy, but I have my car lease, car insurance, gasoline, etc. to pay for as well. So I have to train myself to STOP SPENDING MONEY!!! But this is a good goal for me. If I'm getting married in the next couple years, I want to go into it essentially debt-free. I'd love to be able to release Dad from his co-signer responsibilities on my loans as well, but I don't know what the rules are for that. One thing at a time, I suppose.
My third, and final, resolution (I think three is more than enough) is to get to a healthy weight and habit by my 25th birthday. For me, a healthy BMI/weight puts me at about 160 lbs. That means I have 1 year to lose 100 lbs., roughly 2 lbs. per week. Experts say 2 lbs. per week is a healthy loss. I've researched, and I'm going to start with a 1400 calorie diet. This is probably SIGNIFICANTLY less than my diet now, so I'm thinking it will be rough the first couple weeks, but I'll probably see more than 2 lbs. per week come off. Also, with this tax return, I'm hoping to re-join Curves in Wooster. It's out of the way, but that will make it more of a determination that I WANT to lose this weight and tone my body instead of it being convenient. The only problem with that is that Curves doesn't really have cardio machines (no treadmills or recumbent bikes), so I may end up going to the club for some cardio, or getting in my cardio outside when it's nice enough to do so. I know Dad will help with the diet and exercise thing (I think… he seems to go back and forth on it), but I'm really hoping for support from Blair. I don't really EXPECT him to change his eating habits for me or because of me, and I know he'll eat whatever I cook and he'll be respectful of my diet when he cooks or when we go out to eat, but it would be nice if he didn't make me watch him eat chocolate, cake, etc. I guess that goes along wit having resolve, though. I also am pretty sure he'll go on walks with me and hikes if I ask. We both like to go for drives, and we like to find places to hike, so maybe I'll make more of an effort to find new places for that this year. Spending the time with him will make it not seem so much like exercise.
So I guess the first part of this plan, starting Sunday (20th) is to cut out soda and coffee (my coffee anyways) and start drinking more water and tea (not sweet tea). That part is going to be hard for me, but I'll get through it after a couple weeks. I'm going to put leaner meats and more fish back in my diet, less pasta and more rice, more fruits and veggies, less junk. I get paid this Friday, and I'm hoping Blair will go grocery shopping with me, and Dad will be okay making room in the fridge and freezer for "my" foods. Patience will be moving home after this semester, and I know it will be harder for me to diet with her home, but I will have 4 months to develop a diet and routine, so hopefully it won't be as much of a struggle (diet-wise). The second part of the plan is to get my taxes back and figure out how much I'm getting and how to divide it. WISH ME LUCK!