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NIKKICOLE83
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***you know you've made it when....***

Thursday, February 07, 2013

We all call this crazy diet, exercise, lifestyle change our journey and each person's journey to health and weightloss is different. This isn't my first trip down weightloss road. I made it halfway to goal a couple of years ago and derailed. As I inch closer to goal, I realize how different this time around has been. I feel like I am making it. This is how you know:

1. You can leave emoticon on the plate. I understand now that those last few bites of cake or pie will not be my last. Before it didn't matter how full I was, if you put cheesecake or anything sweet for that matter, in front of me, I felt OBLIGATED to scrape that plate clean. I can now eat desert guilt-free, knowing that it will not ruin my life to endulge, I can savor each bite, say "Uhhm that was good" and put my fork down with some to spare. THAT is growth.

2. You create a life/work/workout balance. I know I failed the last time around because I became an exercise addict and every waking moment was spent burning calories or reading health mags or looking for healthy recipes or SPARKING. I never saw my family or friends or did anything fun because I was afraid of being around temptation. If you want to be healthy for life, you have to realize that FIRST, you must LIVE. You must spend time with family and friends. Of course, you need to work to support that life. Then you must MAKE time to workout. Understanding that there will be times when you will be late to a gathering to get in your burn or you may skip a gathering because you know there will be no options there for you, but that ultimately you have to learn to live amongst those things and be okay if you want to succeed.

3. When you stop giving a flying f*#$ about what others say about your stupid measuring cups and digital scales and your saying "no" to drinking your calories. When you realize that your commitment to your health makes them uncomfortable about their own lifestyle and choices. These people knew you as their buffet buddy, their drinking partner, the cake connosieur and now you no longer participate and it makes them uneasy so they make back-handed compliments, or they say nasty things, or tell you not to get "too skinny". Don't listen to that mess. They aren't the ones who have to pop blood pressure pills.

4. At the same time, you know you have made it when YOU stop trying to change people. This was a HUGE struggle for me. Once you become "enlightened" to the benefits of good nutrition and exercise, you begin to think its your job to "save" all of your family and friends who are overweight. Do you remember how pissed off you would get when someone tried to preach to you about your weight as you ate your burger? Don't do that to the people you love. It is great that you are changing your life but it is not your job to force the hands of others. We all know that no one can do this for you. For months I woke my sister up for workouts, I made her meal plans, I took her grocery shopping, paid for trainers, bought workout shoes. When she didn't live up to MY expectations, I would get sooo frustrated and wouldn't talk to her for days. My fiance told me, "worry about yourself and when she sees how well you are doing, one day she will be inspired to do it for herself." The best advice I could have gotten.

I am still on my way, but this morning I was thinking about these things in particular. I have gained a sense of maturity in this journey that I never would have thought diet and exercise could have given me and I am sure I will make it all the way.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • MAY_MAY007
    Wonderful Blog!!
    #4 hit home for me today! Hardest lesson to learn when u love someone so much. But it less stressful when u learn it!!!

    ~Love Your Blogs~ emoticon
    1390 days ago
  • SARAL72
    Great blog as usual!

    1, I did read that book a few years back, from a French shrink specialized in nutrition, who was talking about breaking the "attach" to food by leaving food on the plate, or cleaning up fridge/pantry and empty it from junk food, just for the idea of being able to put that food in the garbage was really liberating. My parent's being born right after the war, the country was still under ration and food stamp for years, they had this "finish your plate" and "do no waste food" in their blood. Unfortunately for my, with my bad genes, thinking this way probably help to be always a little overweight, and then obese after the kids.

    2. Last time was just a set back, you didn't lose the war, or you wouldn't be where you are today. We learn a lot from our failures...your journey is a big success!!

    3. I'm not drinking soda since August, first time in my life I stay out for so long. And not planning to go back : NEVER AGAIN! so when my kids asked when we had a meal out at Chipotle if I wanted something to drink, they offered to take care of my cup (I never did buy soda for the house, they can only drink it outside...so not often!) the soda fountain didn't offer any option for me (I do no drink diet), they didn't have unsweetened iced tea that day...the kids say "you could have soda for once!" I said no thank's. I had to explain it was too addicting for me, I could eat a little piece of birthday cake because it was once in a while, but soda,it's everywhere, I didn't want to go there again, so many empty calories....no way! I went next door buy a water...they said : I don't know how you do that....well, I don't know either! but that's a victory for sure.

    4 You are such a good sister! but sometimes when someone is not ready for a change, it can take some time. You fiancÚ is right, giving the right example is the best way.
    When I started to eat only organic a few years ago, my mother was always criticizing my decision (when I actually didn't ask her her opinion, or neither tried to impose my ideas!), saying it was a waster of money for nothing, and telling everybody how I was pretending to eat organic, but taking my kids in fast food restaurants all the time. My kids actually had to say that it was a lie, they've been only in burger joints during summer holidays, they actually didn't go there more than twice a year, and only because in the middle of nowhere, we couldn't find better option during our trips. I didn't care about my mother's trying to show I don't know what again. Because at the end of the day, she is not fat, but she is the one with several health issues, that she already had when she was my age.

    My kids did receive a much better education about food than I did, they are slim, healthy and do not have issues related to food like I did at their age.

    That's my biggest victory..and that's why what you do for yourself is the best for your sister. She will want to be like you...just be patient..."do what I do, not what I say" always works...
    1393 days ago
  • BABY_GIRL69
    Good blog!

    God bless,

    Dee
    1395 days ago
  • READY4CHANGE81
    More words of wisdom :) Great Blog!! :)
    1395 days ago
  • NASFKAB
    great blog
    1395 days ago
  • THISSPRING2012
    Love your blog today (yesterday)! So great that you are seeing these things and feeling good about them. You are right! I especially liked your #3. I don't have too much of that going on, but have had comments about my choices of healthy food. I think others are just jealous that I'm eating right and they aren't. I was always told, that the people that make fun of you/tease you are the ones that actually have the low self-esteem. You are so right about #4 as well. I've been there too, with being so excited to be part of SP (and taking gluten out-lost weight b/c of this too), I want others to get on it and meet their goals. It isn't for everyone. It sure is true, that people will commit to changing their life for the better, when they're ready. I was one who kept trying, falling off the wagon, really beating myself up, took months-years off of losing weight. I tried so many different things, THAT DIDN'T WORK. I finally came to where I am, because of me and I was really ready to commit. Keep doing what you're doing! It is obviously working. emoticon
    1395 days ago
  • KPETSCHE
    Nikki - you are so right! Your fiance is right, too!
    1395 days ago
  • CJADERUN
    Number 4 is pretty spot on. Sometimes I'll see someone at the gym, or just around, and think, "Hey--I know what can help you!" And then I get mad at myself for being so damn vain and self-righteous--who says they need my help? Unless they say so, they don't need/want anything from me. Who do I think I am, anyways?

    Plus, it's hella rude. So I just keep my trap shut.
    1395 days ago
  • MERRY_XMAS
    I keep doing #4 but you are absolutely right... I really have to work to change it...
    Thank you for sharing! Great blog!
    emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • LISAN0415
    I liked this blog alot!

    And that's right- This is our journey, and no one should or will get in the way!

    Great going!

    Lisa
    1396 days ago
  • BOGUSANNIE
    Well said!!!

    emoticon blog!
    1396 days ago
  • STEPH-KNEE
    Oh my gosh, I love this and I completely relate to it. On #2, that is exactly why this time is different. Previous weight loss attempts meant that "life was over", I never saw friends or family because I refused to go out to dinner, and was basically living in a bubble to avoid temptation. This time I'm finding the balance and learning to live life and that is why we are going to be successful in the long run. The others you said were so true, I have a BFF who begged me to help her, tell her everything I knew, I did, and when she did it for a week and stopped I was crushed. I really wanted her to succeed because she often confides in me how miserable she is because of her weight... it was hard, but I had to accept it wasn't my job and I just had to let her do her thing. I spent years ignoring advice on how to be healthy from others, and it wasn't until I was ready that I made the change, I have to respect that it's the same for her.

    Great great blog, you are awesome! emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • MAMAJAHMAI
    Such a profound blog...... Your FiancÚ is absolutely right- your life and wonderful progress is speaking the loudest. Thanks for sharing emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • LOVESTOWALK49
    You're making fantastic emoticon progress.
    1396 days ago
  • RDGISME
    An incredibly motivating blog...such realization included! emoticon emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • REGILIEH
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • MISSB8604
    The more I think about how much I've gained by losing weight, I smile. I've become an entirely different person with an entirely different way to look at life. It truly is amazing and even more rewarding then wearing a specific size or weighing a certain number. Losing weight (this time around) literally SAVED MY LIFE.
    1396 days ago
  • SUGAR0814
    Great blog Nikki! emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • ALICIALYNNE
    Great points, especially #4!
    1396 days ago
  • XANGELSTEARZX
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • STELLASMYBEBE
    emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • SKINNIESOMEDAY
    great blog and Number 4 is very hard for me. My DH had a heart attack 4 years ago and now he eats terrible fried foods and fast food constantly and I want to nag him so much and have to bite my tongue. Its so tough.... he never ONCE said anything to me about my weight. very motivating blog !

    emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • LILSHINE
    Hey Nikki - awesome post as always. That one with your sister and family is a very important lesson I too have learned. I just do me and some have started and stopped but I always let them know I need their encouragement and I'm here when they need me. Thanks for reminding us of these things, hope you're having a great week. Down almost a pound this week emoticon Be blessed Vanessa.
    1396 days ago
  • DONNA5281
    emoticon blog

    emoticon emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • PURPLE180
    Another great blog! I am working on #4 I feel like Captain Save "Them" when people ask about my weight loss I get excited and start telling them all the wonderful things they can do to change (hey they asked) but I think I put them on information overload and the shut down. I guess I should tell them that I didn't do everything at once, it was a gradual process. I see people know who are living unhealthy and I just want to tell them to wake up before it is too late and they are sitting at 300 plus pounds wondering what the heck happen. emoticon Love your blog...I can relate.
    1396 days ago
  • CYND59
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    1396 days ago
  • JOHNMARTINMILES
    Way to go! Your most important point is not giving a crap about what other people say and moving on

    Keep on keepin' on and

    Make Today a Great Day!
    1396 days ago
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