Thursday, February 07, 2013
I've always been an easy "victim" of saboteurs. I tend to be the worst one though, often setting myself up to fail. Getting fit though, there are plenty. Some are easier to counter act or avoid than others. I have to be careful with how I word things. I can't say I want to lose weight. You see, I'm not heavy enough to be discriminated for my weight. I'm in better shape than most of my family (not so much counting my husband and kids as I am the family I grew up with, cousins, etc). I can't say, "I need to lose weight" because I get lectured on being skinny. I carry it well. I wear baggy clothes that conceal "flaws". There are temptations put in place, something akin to misery loves company I think. It's an invitation to join those less healthy than I am. There is also a component of fear. What if she does get in great shape? Will she abandon us for a better looking (friend, family member, spouse)? The answer is no, but then the question isn't really about me at all.
I'm lazy. I don't like to work at things. Here is another personality trait some would argue with me about. I go non-stop from the time I get up, until I go to bed for the most part. It doesn't look lazy. But I am. And I'm always looking for an excuse to not do something. Some days I can push past it because I can convince myself that I really *have* to do whatever it is. But I have trouble doing that with food and exercise. If I can do it for the rest of the things I do, I need to just use the same formula that works with the other methods. Stubbornness. That is it. Sheer stubbornness. Putting deadlines in place, a specific goal, helps people understand. They may not understand that I don't want to have to replace my wardrobe for larger sizes, but a 5K run for charity, they can back. That is my defense. This is how I will succeed this time.