Friday will mark my 1 year anniversary of being at, or below, my goal weight of 160 pounds, better known as 1 YEAR OF MAINTENANCE!!! This past year has been one of the hardest years I have ever experienced. Don't get me wrong life has been great. I feel amazing! However; maintenance is HARD! For me losing the weight was a crazy, fun, trying experience, and although physically hard it didn't take nearly the toll that maintenance has on my mind and soul.
Yet here I am one year later and I haven't failed, much to my surprise. I still wake up rather often expecting to see a 300 pound person in the mirror, and it is always a delightful time when I don't. I still have some self esteem issues I am working on and I am still developing a HEALTHY relationship with food, but yet again I am here.
I haven't quit, I haven't given up and even though it is hard, I am still fighting. I still workout almost daily, I still have to watch what I eat and I still have some things to work on, but I am doing it. Working out has become more of my daily routine than a chore, although some days I still have to push myself to do it. I still have days, well more often nights, that I struggle with eating healthy and I even have days I give in.
But for me the most important thing I have learned over the past year is that as long as I am trying I am not a failure. When I entered this crazy maintenance period I was deathly afraid that I was going to fail. That I was going to gain all of my weight back and that I would just be another statistic. Someone who just couldn't do it. I had people tell me "You know you will probably gain all your weight back." "It is just going to be too hard for you to stick to it." I could go on and on. You know what those people did? They gave me the nudge I needed to keep going.
Have I gained some of the weight back, of course. Will weight be a struggle the rest of my life, you better believe it. I certainly didn't get to be 300 pounds because I don't like to eat. But what I do know is that as long as I try, as long as I pull myself out of bed and go to the gym, as long as I don't eat too crazy, I will succeed.
Creeping up on this one year anniversary and still being below my goal weight is surprising, but when I really think about it, of course I am still here. I refuse to go back to where I was. I didn't fight this hard to just give up. I want to show people that hell yes it is hard but IT IS POSSIBLE!!!
Right before I started my journey. (Christmas 2010)
Reaching my "GOAL WEIGHT" (February 2012)
Present Day. (January 31st 2013)