Tuesday, February 05, 2013
On the 7th, I start my second go around with Alia Thalbit's 90 day dance party.
It doesn't seem like a huge deal: dance 20 minutes a day for 90 days. But it's a HUGE deal: 20 minutes a day....for 90 days!
More than that: this is where it all started. I was resigned to the idea that I would be this size for the rest of my life. And then after 30 days, not only had my dancing improved, so had my cardio. After 60 days I had lost 10 pounds without making any other changes. At that point I started watching what I put in my face. By the time my 90 days was over, I was very focused on healthy eating, but I wasn't consistently active anymore.
So here it comes: the second wave: a commitment to be active every day while eating healthy every day. This could mean a big change for me.
I wonder: am I ready? I mean DUH...it's what everyone wants right? Get healthier...get THINNER. But I have ALWAYS been the big girl, I don't know if I know how to be anything else. The creeps weed themselves out because they discount me because of my size. How will I know who they are now? The decisions I make in my life now are ethical and equitable. What if my world changes so much I can't find my own morality anymore? It's scary. I mean it's exciting and amazing and ....scary!