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KITT52
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personal thoughts today

Tuesday, February 05, 2013

I read other spark blogs to help me stay focused on my journey to a healthy life style....
I read one today from a women who wonders when she will notice her weight loss, she has lost 50 pounds but doesn't see it....
I know how she feels, I wish I could put my feelings in to words.....I dont' always express myself as much as I would like too....I know how she feels, even to this day I still can feel like that 347 pound women....I still wonder at times who jeans are in the dryer, I hold up my size 10 jeans and say, really your big but fits in there....lol and yes I have to reply to myself....my but does fit in there...
I still worry at times that the weight will find me, so I play a game with myself to never sit too long, and keep moving so it can;t find me.....I tend to be silly a lot....

my next personal thought today, I need to let myself and others know I not only made wise foods choices at the last 2 parties we went too, but i had a good time, I never use to go to parties because I always felt like the fattest person there...I thought people where staring at me, wonder why or how I got so big and when would I stop.....
Sunday it was nice to be able to drive home and be proud of myself, to feel good about my self and that not only did I eat healthy but I had a good time....I am still quiet at parties, looseing weight did not turn me in to a wild and crazy girl.....but what it did do was give me self respect, I did good, I am living the life I use to dream about....

Loosing weight doesn't make your whole life a bed of roses or a bowl of cherries, but for me I have learned to respect myself as the caring loving person I always was...now not only do I love everyone around me, I love myself as well.....


have a healthy week
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