Monday, February 04, 2013
We all experience it; conflict. It's an unavoidable part of our lives because our beliefs and moods often contrast powerfully with family, friends, acquaintances, co-workers and even our own inner conflicts. Yet for all the grief these can cause, we can also learn much from them. The manner in which we handle ourselves when confronted with negativity, anger or an argumentative person demonstrates our overall level of patience and the quality of our energies. To resolve any conflict, no matter how exasperating, we should always approach it with an open heart laden with compassion. Judgments and blame must be put aside and be replaced with mutual respect. Conflict is frequently motivated by unspoken needs that are masked by confrontational attitudes or aggressive behavior. When we come at conflict with love and acceptance in our hearts, we empower ourselves to discover a means to attaining collective resolution.
The key to finding the wisdom concealed behind the conflict is to ask yourself why you react to a particular person or situation. Your inner self or the universe may just be trying to point you to a specific life lesson, so try to keep your ears and eyes open. Once you have explored the internal and external roots of your conflict, make a conscious effort to release any anger or resentment you feel. As you do so, the energy between you and the other person with change perceptibly, even if they are still operating from a more limited energy state; their negativity. Consider that each of you likely has compelling reasons for thinking and feeling as you do, and accept that you have no power to change your his/her mind. This can help you approach your conflict rationally, with a steady voice and a willingness to compromise.
If you listen thoughtfully and with an empathetic ear during conflict, you can transform unfavorable situations into opportunities to compromise. Examine your thoughts and feelings carefully. You may discover stubbornness within yourself that is causing resistance or that you are unwittingly feeding yourself negative messages about the other person. As your part in disagreements becomes gradually more clear, each new conflict becomes another chance to further hone your empathy, compassion, and tolerance.