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I'm gonna stop being scared

Monday, February 04, 2013

I'm getting toward the end of marathon training, and I'm finding that each long run is petrifying me. I don't know exactly why I've been allowing myself to psych myself out so bad, but that is what I've been doing. I came to a decision just now. I am going to STOP it, and just do what I need to do.

I'm getting older, but I'm by no means old. Heck, if really old people can run marathons (and they can and do), then I can do it, by God. So I'm just going to suck it up and do it.

Several sparkfriends checked in on my blog. They told me they believe in me, and I can do this. They told me to stop psyching myself out, and I am listening. They told me to take another look at fueling, and I'm going to do that. As I thought back on my last run, I kept to my run/walk/run schedule through 18 miles, with no major issues. I slowed down, yes, but I kept going.

In the 19th mile, I flipped the walk/run intervals, and for the last 0.5 mile I walked. Thinking back...I may have run out of fuel somewhere mid 19th mile. My last nutrition was at hour 4, and it was 5 hours in when I pooped out. Maybe, just maybe after 4 hours I need to fuel about every 30 minutes? It's worth a shot.

No matter what, I'm not going to let my fear win. It will not define or rule me. I've thought about Bob a lot on my long runs. Marathon training is hard - the hardest thing physically I've ever done. The last 8 months of Bob's life was hard. He kept his complaining to a minimum, and he never gave up. The least I can do is give the same effort he gave. I'm doing this in his honor, after all.

Now is the time to (wo)man up!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You can do it, Linda. When it gets tough, you will put your head down and push through, and say, "Suck it, marathon! I'm doing this!"
    1808 days ago
    YEAH LINDA!!! I believe in you 100%-- and yes, that's the perfect motivation to keep going--- for Bob!!! I totally forgot that's why you were doing this....

    Trust me... you'll cross that finish line and look back at this training as a very rewarding experience!!!
    1809 days ago
    You totally have the right mind set!!! You can rock these runs... knock out that marathon and think about how amazing you will feel crossing that finish line!!!
    1809 days ago
    emoticon mm emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon and, you almost made me cry!!!
    1809 days ago
    Excellent -you can do it! Don't let your braint try to talk yourself out of something that you can do!! Wishing you the best!!
    1809 days ago
  • KLONG8
    Hi Linda, I haven't been here for a while. A marathon? Wow! That's such a commitment and my DH who ran a lot of these things in his day says "once you know you can make it 18-19 miles then you can do the rest on guts and determination." So I know you are poised to knock this one out of the park. But do look at your nutrition because you will need fuel.

    When is the run?
    1809 days ago
    Go you! You sound so motivated. I really admire people who run marathons. You'll feel so proud of yourself when it's finished and, who knows, a whole new addiction could come out of this!
    1809 days ago
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