Monday, February 04, 2013
We had another winter weather advisory last night so they cancelled school again today. My kids have been home for 5 days straight, and I'm sure they could probably use a break from moody mama!!
I had my 2nd b-12 shot today, and was supposed to see the doctor today for my discoloration. Unfortunately I had to reschedule on them because of a conflict with the kids' orthodontist. Yay, more waiting... but it couldn't be helped.
I'm doing 6 case briefs for plaw. Can you say 'overwhelmed'? I hope I'm doing them correctly. I wish I'd've gone with nutritionist/dietitian instead of paralegal. Maybe then I'd be learning enough to kick my butt in gear. But I'm gonna stick this out and get my degree. I'm a notorious non-finisher. Not this time.
I saw a number on the scale last night that really scared me. I'm not going to share it with you because it was a number I said goodbye to months and months ago and promised myself I would not see again. It really scared me. I couldn't sleep for thinking about it, and it's been hovering in my mind all day long today. Perhaps it's a good thing though, because I haven't had any problem sticking to my meal plan today. I'm also going to have my kids bring my elliptical back up from the basement. I did better about using it when it was staring at me. But let's be honest, I got pretty good at ignoring it there at the end of the year.
I'm thinking i just really need to get back into a schedule. I'm feeling very out of control in all areas of my life. My house was dirty, my laundry piled up, finances are screwy, and weight is creeping up (who'm I kidding, it's not creeping, it's in a full-on sprint!). I took advantage of my kids being home and we tag-teamed the house so it's clean and I've done all the laundry but a couple loads of towels. Clean sheets on the beds, clean throws in the living room, clean rugs on the floor. It is AMAZING how just those little things can make you feel so much better.
Anyway, I'm going to spend some time making a flow chart for my day (after my homework, of course). I did them for work and they always worked really well. The flylady schedule works well. There is a lot of sense in scheduling, and a lot less stress. I can get my DH and kids out the door in the mornings, and while my eggs are steaming for 15 minutes, I can get some time on the elliptical. Otherwise I'm just sitting around watching tv while I wait for the timer to go off! Why not make better use of my time?
I've fallen back into the procrastination trap. And the self-pity pitfall. Yes, there have been some stressful events and physical illnesses. Yes, there have been social gatherings and unexpected bills. It is still no excuse for being slothful and self-loathing.
I read a devotional several days ago that has been resonating with me... I can't remember which scripture it was for, but it was basically about Sabbath and rest and letting the land rest and so forth (which is what it was talking about, the land). Anyway, the author was saying how the Israelites were forsaking the rules about the Sabbath year and weren't letting the land rest, they were completely stripping the land and wearing it out, and because they wouldn't let it rest, it would become barren and useless to them. Then, the land would get its rest, because it was useless. If any of you have read this, too, correct me if I'm wrong. I've slept since then and I forget, lol :)
So anyway, I started thinking about the importance of rest and sleep and taking care of our body. If we aren't taking time to rest, we get depleted of nutrients and our hormones go all crazy. If we aren't replenishing those nutrients with good food and keeping our 'land' hydrated with lots of water, we're just going to dry up. I don't want to get my 'rest' because I'm sick and I HAVE to rest. I don't want to be a useless tract of land because I haven't been a good steward of the 'land' I've been given.
I only have this one tract of land. I'd like it to be productive for as long as possible!!