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    JACKI1033   5,864
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5,500-6,999 SparkPoints
 
 
Starting over again, again.

Monday, February 04, 2013

I'm so tired of starting over. Every time it is more tedious than the last.
And every time I gain it back, I gain back just a little bit more.

I can't seem to lose weight on my own, I can't seem to lose weight with my boyfriend (well, he's losing weight, but I'm gaining it) but I have a hard time sticking to these online sorts of weight loss programs.

But I'm starting again. Because otherwise it's just going to get worse.

Last year was terrible. I got hurt at work, left my job and have been unemployed for almost a year. I fell into a deep depression because of this and I have been struggling ever since.

I saw doctors and tried medications but none really worked and some made me gain even more weight.

This last month we moved to Chicago. Well, I moved first, Ken just got here. So the last month was a struggle too, adjusting to a new city. My relationship is in a needing work phase, which is stressful also.

But I'm really done gaining weight and feeling crappy.

I'm off all the meds, I've become a volunteer at a museum, I've joined an awesome gym that I'm committing to going to 4-5 days a week, if only to try out their cool classes!

I'm nixing junk food and beer. I'm cutting back on the amount I eat and how often I eat out. When I first moved to Chicago, we didn't have gas (no heat, no stove, etc) so I was eating out almost everyday. I was also walking a ton but now that it is really cold I've become less active while still not eating great.

My goals for this week are to drink 8+ glasses of water a day, 1 salad a day and go to the gym 4 times.
Also, no junk food (candy, fried foods, processed sugary crap) or beer.

I feel like a fool to come back with my tail between my legs, but I know I'm not the only one who has been here before.

I look forward to the support I get from fellow Sparkers.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COASTERKAT 2/13/2013 11:03PM

    There is nothing wrong with starting over!! Sometimes that's the motivation you need - it didn't work the first time but maybe it will work the second time!! I was very successful on my first try but all my good habits fell by the wayside. I had the same experience you did - getting hurt at work and leaving your job. I was lucky enough to only be out of work for a month before my doctor cleared me to return to full duty and I was able to find another position in the same field, but I'd long since fallen off the bandwagon!!

Keep it going!! Looking forward to celebrating your success!!
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RLLRKAT 2/5/2013 12:34PM

    Keep trying girl! It takes the right time and the right mindset. I've tried 4 times. Now it seems to be sticking! My only advice.. Don't try to do too many things at one time. PICK one small goal and start there. Mine this time was water. 8 cups a day. I worked on that for 2-3 full weeks before adding something more. I've just added10 mins of exercise a day in the last 2 weeks. I'm sticking to it this time, because it's a manageable chunk. Not overwhelming.

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LADYABIGAIL627 2/4/2013 3:06PM

    Oh honey, you are preaching to the Queen of starting over! It doesn't matter where you've been, only where you are. It is stronger to face the fact that you need to make changes (and you're making them) to sit there and lament about all of the things that make you feel bad about yourself. I say hooray for being back! Also, give yourself a break here. You sound like you just had A LOT going on that became (out of necessity) top priority. And look...when those changes have died down you have made yourself #1 again. Most excellent! emoticon

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JLEMUS1 2/4/2013 2:11PM

    Heck yeah at least you came back and are ready to kick it into overdrive!!! Many of us just don't have the strength to return and become better, healthier and stronger!!! I wish we all had your courage!!! Kick butt!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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