I changed my i-Pod name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.
Then it dawned on me.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
PMS jokes aren't funny, period.
Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.
I didn't like my beard at first...Then it grew on me.
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
Broken pencils are pointless.
I tried to catch some fog. I mist.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I needed dough.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
Velcro - what a rip off!
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
Never fall in love with a tennis player, because to a tennis player, love means nothing.