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Diverting my frustration

Monday, February 04, 2013

My task today is to blog about the reasons behind my fitness and weight loss goals, what is my true motivation, and what I hope to achieve or experience once I reach the goal. This should be interesting as I'm more than a little frustrated that for the 2nd week in a row after sticking very close to my goals for both nutrition and fitness, I haven't lost a single pound. And while my measurements look smaller than 4 weeks ago, my clothes feel the exact same. I'm not entirely convinced I measured the same spots.

But that is not what this blog is supposed to be about. My goals? What are they really? See, this is a hard one for me to define. I can't really say it is outside pressure pushing me to lose weight and be more fit because most people seem to look at me like I have two heads when I mention that I am attempting to do either. I really do want to fit into my clothes again. I like the way some of them make me feel when I do. I'm getting older. Getting and staying fit will be harder to do with each year that passes. I don't want to get to the point that my hard work won't show. I want to be the healthy looking old chick - the one with the glow to her face that looks like she can do whatever needs doing. I guess that is it in a nutshell really. I want to look that way, but I want to be that way too. I'd like to say it is all about being able to keep up with the kid and eventually grandchildren if that is to be, but really I just want to be able to be self-sufficient and look like I am as well.

My true motivation at this point is just that I really don't want to fail. At the moment, fear of failure is a bigger motivating force than anything else. I've shared the goals, including running in my first 5K, with nearly everyone I know and only one person has asked about what happens after the 5k. I hadn't really thought about post-5k. I guess just to keep it up so the following year, I best my time.

As fir what I hope to achieve, I think I hope that this all becomes so second nature to me, that it doesn't always feel like work. I don't want every decision to be a debate that I have to have in my head before making the right choice.

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  • CDCSMITH2013
    Thank you both. I'm going to give it another week and if things don't look right still, I'll email the spark coach thingy (high scientific wording there).
    1869 days ago
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    1869 days ago
    I feel your pain. I think we have so much in common. The weight that you started this journey on is not that significant so the weight is going to come off very slowly(which I'm told is a good thing because then it tends to stay off) To those around you, you probably don't look like you need to lose weight, but I understand completely when you say you just want to look better and feel more fit and get back into those clothes that you used to wear that are just a little bit sung (or maybe a lot a bit snug but snug nontheless!!) What I hear you saying most importantly is that you are doing this for yourself not anyone else and that is what is important. I try not to obsess with the scale. Unfortunately I have not been able to break that daily habit and it can either made or break my day. When I have those days that the scale says is a "fail" meaning there is no weight loss, I just try to remember all the good I am doing for myself. If I know I have been exercising and eating right I know the reward will come. I also try to remind myself to be honest with myself and track every single thing that I have put in my mouth. I know sometimes those little extras that we don't write down because we think it won't matter add up over time. Anyway, keep at it, don't give up. I agree, it does seem like work right now. All the pre-planning, shopping ahead of time, so we don't just put anything in our system because we are hungry, remembering to drink all that water, fitting in the exercise. It's so early in the game for me; I just keep telling myself and reminding myself of all of the success stories and that I can be one of those too!!. Being in this community has helped so much because I feel like I am committed to so many people (eventhough I don't really know them) but I don't want to disappoint anyone who has offered me support. I commend you in wanted to run a 5K. I've often fantasized about that but am not sure my knees could take it. Be strong, hang in there and you will be successful!!
    1869 days ago
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