Today while I was searching for my weight gloves I came across an old journal of mine. It was a trip I took back in 2006-2008. It was the highs (my starting weight of 234lbs) to my low (155) and back up to 195. The one thing I noticed was the negativity. I really did beat myself up A LOT! Even when I was at 155 and a size 8, it wasn't good enough, I didn't seem to like myself. It really isn't a wonder why I gained the weight back.
Am I perfectly happy with how things are going right now, yes I really am. I am seeing the journey for what it is. I want to stay happy and focused at every stage of this! Will I have bad days? Yes, I suppose I will but I hope I don't dwell on them too much.
Finding this journal really kind of made my day! I mean how often do you get to go back in time and find out about who you were, and see how far you have come?!
Every thing happens for a reason and this find today really gives me hope!
I am such a different person then I was back then. I have grown up, the man I was with back then didn't treat me the best. My kids at the time were treating me kinda like a door mat. I don't like the weakness I saw in me then and I am proud to have changed that around!
I have a wonderful husband, my kids now have much more respect for me and I have more respect for myself.
I will see 155 again, and I will pass it BUT you know what? I will appreciate the work it took me to get there and NEVER take it for granted! You can count on that!