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    CHERIE682   36,545
30,000-39,999 SparkPoints

a step back in time....

Sunday, February 03, 2013

Today while I was searching for my weight gloves I came across an old journal of mine. It was a trip I took back in 2006-2008. It was the highs (my starting weight of 234lbs) to my low (155) and back up to 195. The one thing I noticed was the negativity. I really did beat myself up A LOT! Even when I was at 155 and a size 8, it wasn't good enough, I didn't seem to like myself. It really isn't a wonder why I gained the weight back.
Am I perfectly happy with how things are going right now, yes I really am. I am seeing the journey for what it is. I want to stay happy and focused at every stage of this! Will I have bad days? Yes, I suppose I will but I hope I don't dwell on them too much.
Finding this journal really kind of made my day! I mean how often do you get to go back in time and find out about who you were, and see how far you have come?!
Every thing happens for a reason and this find today really gives me hope!
I am such a different person then I was back then. I have grown up, the man I was with back then didn't treat me the best. My kids at the time were treating me kinda like a door mat. I don't like the weakness I saw in me then and I am proud to have changed that around!
I have a wonderful husband, my kids now have much more respect for me and I have more respect for myself.
I will see 155 again, and I will pass it BUT you know what? I will appreciate the work it took me to get there and NEVER take it for granted! You can count on that!

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
LUNADRAGON 2/4/2013 11:08AM

    You have a good attitude. I need to let that rub off on me.

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CATLADYX8 2/4/2013 11:06AM

    What great insight. It is interesting to see ourselves from the past. I too used to be very negative towards myself. AS I have grown over this past year I have changed how I treat myself. I keep a credit journal and write down all the things I give myself credit for over the course of a day. I dwell on the positive things rather than the negative things and I find I do so much more right than I do wrong. I agree that there will, and have been bad days, but it is how we deal with them and get over them that counts. We grow a little each time we encounter trials. I wish you well on your continued journey.

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