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    ANGIEHOLLAND461   397
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First Failure


Saturday, February 02, 2013

Well Yesterday I did it I had my first setback failure big time. I started out my day pretty well but then Mom called and said the words Lets Go to Town now moms idea of town is shopping then lunch at some nice place. I of course said oh yes mom cause well it was mom and I dare not say Hell no mom you know im dieting and town will kill me. Im not sure I would have survived and I had visions of 8 pallbearers hauling my fat a---- to the graveside so I was a good girl and said ok mom lets roll. I got her dressed and into the car well dang it was early and she said I need a biscuit so to the nearest fast food chain I went and got HER a biscuit but I did well I opted for unbuttered toast on wheat bread and a bottle of water, Then to town where I unloaded the wheel chair 97 times and loaded it back 98 times ( I missed the trunk once ) then off for lunch at cracker barrel omg of all the places this is where she wanted to go a place that had the brains to combine shopping and eating my two weaknesses and another weakness showed up my daughter and granddaughter met us there. I said ok the heck with this diet and I had hamburger steak, mac and cheese, and sweet tea and bought a few things for the granddaughter after 92 dollars and blowing my diet mom decided she wanted to go home thank the Lord so we came home .
As I drove into the driveway of my moms house it was then I realized my son and his new daughter was at the house OMG he always wants me to cook for him I prayed please God let him be full just this once didnt happen so we all decided to fix homemade pizza later for dinner. Why I didnt go straight on and track the calories for the day and at least know where I stood is still a mystery but my mind said ok you have blown the day so eat donuts yep we found the donuts at moms house sat and talked and ate. Thats how the whole day went for me eat , eat, and eat some more,
Now Due to my lack of control and my non ability to say no to cracker barrels across the globe I had one epic failure. I didnt eat healthy, I didnt exercise ( well loading the wheelchair and walking from store to store may count somewhat) I didnt track it was awful. However on a good vibe to end this blog in the past one bad day would lead to two bad days which would lead to giving up but this time I told myself over and over and even wrote it down on the frig that One day wont kill me learn from the mistakes I made see how I can change things for the next time this happens and move forward. This morning as I went into the kitchen to find a snack I saw that little note I had left to myself and thought ok today is a new day my slate is wiped clean I have 24 hours all brand new to do things better so what choice am I gonna make today will I eat right , track, exercise? The answer to my inner self is yes I am Im not giving in and Im not giving up this time around so I grab a special K bar , the bottle of water and came straight here to track it all. Im one proud lady this morning I didnt slip into old habits. I conquered the demons of donuts one more time( by the way I threw the left over donuts in the trash) of course my daughter Hailey said uh mom Im not dieting and I was gonna eat those for breakfast I threw her a special K bar and said ok my dear its never to early to learn good habits of course she rolled her eyes at me but she ate it with a glass of milk lol I may like the changes after all.
So in case you dont understand the moral of this story its simple Never give up dont let your past decide your future not even one day of the past God gives us all 24 hours a day every day to make choices we either fill those hours with good stuff or bad stuff its our choice and I have to say I like knowing that everyday I can start over with a brand new day and only think about this day yesterday is gone we cant undo anything we did yesterday and tomorrow never comes we cant do anything for tomorrow so we can only do what we need to do today one day at a time for me I like that and its working .
I know I will struggle again with the choices I make but I wont give up Never say never. I already feel better and its only been a week since I started this journey in a serious way and Im enjoying every step of this journey yes I have some bruises, yes I made some wrong choices but overall Im having a blast who knew exercise and dieting could really be so fun and so rewarding I cant wait to step on the scale and see the results of my hard work or wear that orange skirt I have in my closet .
I hope everyone is having a great time on their own personal journeys as I have and remember failure isnt the end just learn from the mistakes and move on to another better day.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SINGLEGAL3 2/2/2013 9:51AM

    Just be kind to yourself and don't let setbacks get you down. this journey we're on is full of ups and downs. Hang in there!!!

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