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    CLPURNELL   31,225
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What do I do now.....

Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Friday, February 01, 2013

Often people reach a goal and think the above thought. They have worked so hard to get to an arbitrary number and realize they may be smaller but they still aren't happy. They still see all their flaws and none of their successes. I feel that happens because you trade one addiction (food) for another (diet and exercise). Without addressing the why or how you got where you were in the first place.

You have to fight the real reasons you aren't happy. Often this has zero to do with weight loss. Because no matter how much weight you lose you won't be happy. You have to learn to be happy with who you are in your entirety now. Not at goal weight or anything else. Food addiction is just like any other addiction it often is a tool for we use to numb ourselves from some sort of pain in our life. Some sense of guilt or not being worthy or what ever it is.

To be truly successful at LIFE (not only weight loss) We have to strive to banish those demons. Forgive others and ourselves and let go of past pain, heart ache and guilt. No exercise routine to fix that and it is often a hard and emotional journey.

You have the power to change your life in ways you wouldn't even dream. 2 years ago I was 350+ pounds and miserable. I have lost 100+#s and am living a life better than I ever dreamed. I didn't win a lotto or get surgery I started making very conscious decisions to do what made me happy. to do what made me feel good about myself. To stop defining myself by anyone else's terms. To take power over the only thing I have control over and that is MY life. The mind is the most powerful tool we have. unfortunately many of us have been hard wired to use it against ourselves. To make it limit us. To make us define ourselves in negative ways or worse yet to define ourselves by the reflection in someone else's eyes.

This whole journey isn't easy. It's not magic. It's hard work both internally and externally. We have to do the work on both sides of the equation. The goal of life is TO BE HAPPY. That's it. you do that you win. hands down. Not to collect the most cars, houses, jewelry but to fill that hole inside that many of us attempted to fill with food. That hole is a lack of happiness we can't fill it with money, fame, relationships, toys or anything else. we have to fill it with what makes us individually happy. We have to seek out and find our happiness. We have to practice doing what makes us happy. We have to take risks of falling flat on our faces sometimes to be happy, But once you are truly happy and you have changed your mind set and emotions on what really matters to you. You will be in absolute awe of what you can accomplish. Not only in weight loss but in life.

Then your mind isn't fighting against you it is fighting for you. then you can not only build yourself up but build up those around you. Then you aren't afraid to try thing because you know whether it works or not you will take something positive away from it. What ever you truly want in life you can have. It may not be in the way you thought you would get it but you can get there. I for one am living proof...











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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HDHAWK 2/2/2013 10:22PM

    Great blog! You've accomplished a lot!

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SERASARA 2/2/2013 9:39PM

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TUBJUMPER 2/2/2013 9:27PM

    emoticon m emoticon m

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NEWTINK 2/2/2013 9:18PM

    Very nicely put ... and your pics show that you have done an amazing job on your journey ... emoticon

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BONIFIANT 2/2/2013 8:35PM

    I have to agree with everything you have written, but I also think that the first place to finding lasting inner happiness is by finding true faith in the God of this universe who created each of us with a vacuum only His love can fill.

So thrilled with your current success and wishing you continued success in this journey toward the best health you have ever enjoyed.

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CLAYARTIST 2/2/2013 8:33PM

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CURVYGURL8 2/2/2013 8:24PM

    Thank you, thank you, thank you! You preached this time, my brother! I am in tears. Well said, and well done!

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LIVINHEALTHY9 2/2/2013 8:18PM

    Truly insightful and well written blog!
Congrats to you on your weight loss and much continued success.

Spark on!

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KWOOD1955 2/2/2013 8:06PM

    Your blog is an inspiration to us all!

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AJB121299 2/2/2013 7:54PM

    Nice blog

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JACKIE542 2/2/2013 7:42PM

    Very inspiriring blog, congratulations to you. Thank you emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PATRICIAANN46 2/2/2013 7:06PM

  So very well said............. emoticon

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TERMITEMOM 2/2/2013 7:02PM

    emoticon Truly inspirational!

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DUSTYPRAIRIE 2/2/2013 6:42PM

    Sensational!

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MARYJEANSL 2/2/2013 5:55PM

  Congratulations on your weight loss and all your successes - in life as well as in weight loss.

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ALIDOSHA 2/2/2013 5:42PM

    emoticon emoticon

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HEARTS116 2/2/2013 5:27PM

    Amazing transformation!!!!
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-DAVE- 2/2/2013 4:36PM

    Chris my man,

You've said it all. Why should we wait for that number to be happy; after all if the number comes in a long time from now, that's a loooong time to be happy. I too identified that my issues are deep in my head; years of behavior and eventually giving in to the food demons inside. Thanks for driving this home for me once again and the support you've shown. I appreciate it as well as the wake up call.

Be good tomorrow.... emoticon

Later man and awesome job on getting to be a featured blogger - you deserve it.

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Comment edited on: 2/2/2013 4:37:41 PM

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JSANCHEZ780 2/2/2013 4:31PM

    That was a true joy to read! Refreshing, true and honest! My husband and I often discuss ideas like this with our children. It can get mucky...to say the least. To steal a line from another Spark user, "we are living a healthy life so Jesus has a beautiful temple to reside in".
we feared that our 15yr old freshman son may get caught up in the "jock" mentality and do dangerous things to compete. we worried our 12yr old 7th grade daughter might over exercise or starve herself. We try to teach "Health is Sexy"!
as humans we always fall victim to the idea that this "thing" whatever it may be, as you so eloquently detailed, will become the idol we rest our success or failure on. When the truth is, our happiness stems from the quality of the thoughts we have about ourselves.
"i did a great workout today" could so easily become "i could've worked harder". Our happiness starts in our mind, not our muscles :)
Thank you again for this awesome post! It was really very comforting :)
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JAMER123 2/2/2013 4:02PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HAPPYMENOW58 2/2/2013 3:36PM

    awesome!!! Keep up the good work!!!!! YOU are an inspiration......GREAT BLOG!!!!! emoticon

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ARCHIMEDESII 2/2/2013 3:26PM

    Fantastic blog !! Congratulations on making progress, mind, body and soul.

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KARRENLYNN 2/2/2013 3:21PM

    Congratulations on your success so far, inside and out. You've made a lot of great points, some I need to work hard on.


Keep going on your journey, you're doing great!

Karen emoticon

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LIVELYGIRL2 2/2/2013 2:51PM

  You nailed the nail on it's head, so true, that usually there are things that contribute to extra weight, like insecurity, unresolved pain, anger, hurt, lack of control, unhappiness, stress, and on and on.

I'm so happy for you!!! and thanks for sharing your success and thoughts with us, very wise. May God continue to bless YOU !!! emoticon

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IAMAGEMLOVER 2/2/2013 2:39PM

    Great blog. Thank you for sharing.

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MELINA3582 2/2/2013 2:07PM

  glad to hear that you are getting along so well! you look wonderful! have an amazing day!

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LADYABIGAIL627 2/2/2013 1:38PM

    Very inspirational! You are so right. I am struggling with this now, being happy and working on just being me. I love your quote about how it is worst, "to define ourselves by the reflection in someone else's eyes." The courage to be me. Oh my, how I work on this. Thank you for so much to think about. Best wishes to you on your journey!

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LAURACONNER 2/2/2013 1:26PM

    You are so right and thanks for the blog - i have gained and lost and gained so much weight over my life - i am praying that i get it right this time and reading your words - spoke to my heart. Thank you very much!! emoticon

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MCFITZ2 2/2/2013 1:25PM

    Thank emoticon you for expressing what I have believed for a long time.

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KWEEKWEK 2/2/2013 1:22PM

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FAT2GAINHEALTH 2/2/2013 12:53PM

    You certainly have got yourself together and look wonderfully happy. Thanks for the insight. I have recently learned to love myself and then my weight has gone done slowly but surely.
Marcia emoticon

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KIMPAINTS 2/2/2013 12:48PM

    Wow you are a popular fellow in Spark town..Wisdom, success, just what I like to start my day with! emoticon emoticon Thank you!

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2JUSTME 2/2/2013 12:24PM

    Great blog! You are so right!!!

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TXMOMMY23 2/2/2013 12:12PM

    Love the blog!!! thank you for your inspiration and congrats on the weight loss you look great

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MSROZZIE 2/2/2013 11:58AM

    Loved reading your blog! Very inspirational and encouraging. Great photos too. Keep Sparking in 2013! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DAINALYNN 2/2/2013 11:58AM

    Lots of simple wisdom in your words here. Thanks for sharing your lessons!

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FIREWOMN 2/2/2013 11:44AM

    What a great story. And your photos are worth 1000 pounds for weight loss for anyone who reads your blog. Thank you for the inspiration and good common sense.

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CASSIOEPIA 2/2/2013 11:38AM

    Very insightful. Great blog.

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WALLINMW 2/2/2013 11:35AM

  Stay motivated!

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DIANNEMT 2/2/2013 11:19AM

    I had a bad day the other day--no good reason for feeling "down" and sorry for myself. We need to cultivate contentment--every day.

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DJSHIP46 2/2/2013 11:18AM

    Congratulations... Thanks for sharing!!!

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UNSWEETMAMA 2/2/2013 11:06AM

    Well said! Amen.

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JUSGETTENBY42 2/2/2013 11:01AM

    emoticon

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SMWILLIAMS29102 2/2/2013 10:59AM

    You have done a great job! Keep up the good work.

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FIRECOM 2/2/2013 10:56AM

    Obviously a very popular blog and for good reason. It is an internal problem for sure. I have walked down the same kind of path as you. I am down to 162 from a high of 335.

Thank you for a great and honest blog.

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CLIMBERS_ROCK 2/2/2013 10:45AM

    Unfortunately that is so true. I need to figure out why I gained back 25 pounds after reaching my goal while I work on loosing it again. That is the tough part.

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NEPTUNE1939 2/2/2013 10:43AM

    emoticon

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NEWMOM20121 2/2/2013 10:33AM

    Well said and so true. Great blog.

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MARTAY123 2/2/2013 10:24AM

  Great blog! thank you!

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2013LOSE20 2/2/2013 10:21AM

  You're a very wise man! All of us that have lost weight and found it's not the utopia we had hoped for can sure relate to your words. It's even harder to get to goal weight as you don't have weight as your excuse any longer and those demons are smack in your face.

Thank you so much for this blog.

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