Overwhelmed and Frustrated
Friday, February 01, 2013
I'm so annoyed and frustrated right now. I have been so focused on getting the pannectomy surgery that I WANT that I have been avoiding a very real fact. I have a hernia. Again. That probably needs surgical repair. Again. SERIOUSLY!?!?!?! I have had this stupid ventral hernia repaired 4 times already, and have 3 meshes holding me together. It's been bulging more during exercise the past few weeks, and yesterday became very painful while doing crunches on the bosu ball.
If you don't know.... having an abdominal hernia repaired is not an easy surgery. I have a 14" scar down my tummy to prove it. It's painful with a several week recovery period. I've had infections and other complications in the past from them. This is a road I desperately hoped was in the past.
The other complication in this is that I have a surgeon I trust. Implicitly. He has done the past 3 repairs after the first failed and did quite a bit of damage in the process. And when my Cesarean got infected, he is the surgeon that my OB called in. But he has recently switched hospital providers... and I work for (and am insured through) a competing hospital. That means I will likely be referred to a different surgeon for repair. This thought is terrifying.
The only UP side is that I am in the best physical shape that I've been in since High School. Perhaps that would improve the recovery. I also want to investigate getting the pannectomy done simultaneously (I believe 100% that 17# of skin hanging is hindering the hernia repairs).
I've set up an appointment with my primary doc, and in the meantime will work to continue to lose weight and stay fit & health. THAT, at least, is in my control.