Friday, February 01, 2013
A goal weight is hard to define. At 145lbs, 2lbs from now, I will be in the healthy BMI range. So I should be happy there – right?
But I have been down to 143lbs but didn’t stay there? Why? Because I was not happy with my body! I knew that I still carried a lot of fat, especially around my middle area. So looking back I now realise that I was in a way disappointed that having reached my goal weight I still was not happy! That unhappiness and confusion led to not having any clear plan on what to do from then on, which of course led to gaining weight again!
So am I ever going to be happy with my body at any weight? And why do I not want to go under 140lbs which I now realise I need to. I have been fooling myself that I have a big frame when actually I haven’t!!
The thing is that I know that if I go under 140lbs, I am going to get far more of the ‘oh you are too thin’ or ‘don’t lose any more or you will look terrible’ type comments (I already get them, I just know I will get more)
But I have now given myself permission to go below 140lbs. I am not going to take to heart any negative comments I get. I will see them for what they are. They don’t have to live in my body, I do. I have no wish to be sick or sickly looking. I eat far healthier when I am trying to lose weight as I try to make every calorie count! I hate wasting calories on junk!
So I am going to decide for myself when I am happy with my weight and it is not where I am at now. And my plan – to keep eating sensibly and healthily and exercising regularly, including ST! I am going to take it one step at the time and I will know when I get there!!