Day 27: Self Aware
Friday, February 01, 2013
Being Self Aware doesn't mean you focus your attention on all the bad stuff in your life. It means identifying the bad, like a detective, and working to make it better. Keep your thoughts neutral, neither good or bad, and just gather the facts. then use those facts logically to make yourself better. Step outside yourself a little, and assess a situation like a good friend rather than like your internal enemy.
Currently I am trying to figure out why I have so many issues with eating at home. I am awesome all day... Breakfast protein shake, mid-morning snack, salad for lunch, afternoon snack, and tons of water! I'm fine all day. Then I get home, and it's sabotage time... Crap for dinner, or snacking at 9 or 10pm. Currently because I don't have bad stuff in the house, it's relatively low calorie, or healthy whole foods, and I still stay close to my calorie range, but it has me concerned. What will I do when I have a high calorie item in the house? Will I go crazy and eat 3 or 4 servings instead of just one? If someone makes me Gluten Free Christmas cookies, will I be able to just eat one, or will I eat the whole box? Yes, I know there are temporary fixes for these problems, like keeping that stuff out of the house, or take the cookies to work where you have more control... but my real question is Why do I have this issue?
Being self aware, to me, means I notice these things about myself and then I work to make them better. I don't beat myself up about it because I know I can and will change it. I don't talk bad to myself because that is an old habit that doesn't serve any purpose. Instead, I'm putting it out there, to see if I can find the reason behind this phenomenon...
Actually, just writing this all down, I can see one difference. At night I'm alone, my guard is down, and I am not busy. At work I am talking all day, my mind and my hands are busy, and my guard is up because everyone can see what I eat, etc. At home it's just me... I am adding this to my prayer list, and starting my visualizations right now...
I'm visualizing myself busy at home (painting, organizing, singing, etc.) and I'm surrounded by people (visitors, friends, boyfriend?, phone calls, etc.) and holding myself accountable (create a plan for night time meals.. I pack my lunch & snacks and have a plan for the day. Why not pack a dinner and snack and a plan for night too?)
Ok, well I feel better already. I hope you can stop and do some detective work on yourself as well. Don't forget to be neutral, and don't beat yourself up... You are an amazing person, with a lot to offer the world... Be a friend to yourself; She(he) needs you!
have a happy healthy day!