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Thursday, January 31, 2013

I'm Gonna Be a Bear

In this life, Iím a woman. In my next life, Iíd like to come back as a bear. When youíre a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, youíre supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.

When youíre a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while youíre sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I could definately deal with that.

If youíre mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.

If youíre a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup, gonna be a bear!

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