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    QUEENDARKLADY   11,664
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Over and Over again

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

I've not been having the best week. I've been feeling mildly ill in odd ways all week. It's not been simple things, like a runny nose or a scratchy throat. It has been things like dizziness, queasiness, headaches, and occasional tightness in my chest. I'm not sure what is causing this. Also, I have found that I feel better only when I am actively putting food in my mouth. It's kind of like the cough drop effect - your throat feels better while you are sucking on it, but as soon as it's gone so is the relief that it offered. I've also noticed that the queasiness in my stomach has been more apparent when I eat something not-so-good (like pizza) than when I eat something good (like grapes). Is my body finally telling me to kick the habit of all this crap? I'm not sure..

To make matters worse, there hasn't been a single day this week that I haven't been over my calorie limit. I've been doing really good with water, and I eat well while I'm at work, but then I get home and pig out on 4 pieces of pizza, or candy and popcorn, or alcohol. Where did this habit even come from? I'm wondering if it is related to my feeling ill. Either way, stacking failure on top of illness seems to me like a recipe for more failure. My motivation is down, as is my energy. I've still got the same good intentions that I had last week, just not the drive to make them a reality. I need to wipe my slate clean again. I need to start over. I need to go back to my mantra. "5 Minutes" may just be all it takes to get me going back in the right direction.
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