The past few days I have been a lot more social. I got out to see one of my former classmates last week for lunch and yesterday I had lunch at Panera with 3 more of them. It was so good to be around these women. For some odd reason I turn into a stand-up comic around them. We all laughed so much that tears were streaming out of our eyes and I suspect we might have been annoying to the tables around us. Oh well!
In fact, we were there so long that late afternoon coffee turned into early dinner. I checked the nutrition stats online before I left the house, but I forgot which 1/2 sandwich to order and got one that was a bit higher in calories AND they made a mistake on my order and gave me a Greek salad instead of a house salad, which was also higher in calories. But, I was so satisfied that even eating at 4pm, I didn't need anything else when I got home.
The one trance session that I tend to miss is the 'before dinner' one. When I'm home, I tend to be cooking the dinner so I'm sort of busy before dinner. When I'm out, well I'm not very well going to put my earbuds in for 20 minutes at the table! I do really like that session and may move it to lunchtime on days when I have the chance. But, I haven't noticed any real problems from skipping it.
Two things I noticed as 'gifts' yesterday. First, I didn't worry about how I looked. Often I think, "I wonder if this shirt makes me look lumpy" or something along those lines. I am often hyper-aware of what I "think" other people are thinking about how I look. The thing is, it never crossed my mind. I didn't care. I was just ME having a good time with my friends. It is entirely possible that I could be the mother of the youngest one of these women and at times I suppose I have compared myself to them - thinking how they are more fit, more fashionable, blah blah blah. Yesterday, I just concentrated on our connection and that was so very nice. Second, I really enjoy food. I do.
But the other thing I noticed that the food didn't really take up much of my attention. I ordered, I ate. But, my mind and focus were on my friends and what they had to say and share. I'm not saying that I was mindlessly eating, because boy have I done that before. You know, when you shove food into your face and an hour later you can't remember what you ate, or even IF you ate, so you eat more! NO, it wasn't that at all. It was just that food sort of receded into the backdrop of the afternoon - into its proper place. I ate because I was hungry. I was sated. The end. Ummmm YAY.
Tomorrow I am driving about an hour and a half into the San Francisco area to have a 1:1 hypnotherapy session at a clinic with a graduate student in clinical hypnotherapy. I've never had in-person trance work and I am really looking forward to seeing what it is like. I'm also checking into the school and talking to the director there. She is a fascinating woman, with a Ph.D. in religious studies and a Masters in Counseling, and one of the primary instructors. She performs and teaches some therapy in addition to the trance work that I am really intrigued by - including sand play with children. It should be a fascinating afternoon. Since I don't intend to get into a Masters program until perhaps fall of next year, I may study with her. I think that might be kind of awesome!
Today, I am going to start working on life clutter. I suspect I will function better in my weight-loss goals and just in general if I get a better handle on my day-to-day chores and sense that the house is seriously de-cluttered.
I'm just so happy to finally be up and about and interested. The women I talked too all have taken a break, in their own way, after we graduated. I was glad they shared that, because I was judging myself pretty harshly for this. But, every person really knows what is best for their own life, if they check within and I should remember that what others think of me is none of my business. Some people thrive on the busy chaotic push of life, and others do better when they push through for a while, and then rest and recoup. I fall into the later category and that is perfectly ok!
Ok.. ONWARD SPARKERS!!!