Monday, January 28, 2013
So on Saturday Andy and I went out to eat like we normally do... and in the evening Andy was *so* sick. I seriously have never seen him this sick in my life. Without going into much detail it's similar to what someone would get when they have food poisoning/stomach flu. I tried sooo hard to keep myself from getting sick. Washed my hands every time I helped him, cleaned dishes as well as possible... but I am thinking that when Andy handed me my water bottle so I can take my Synthroid in the morning, that he might have accidentally given me his (this was at 6:30 A.M.). :(!!
Thankfully I do not feel THAT sick. It could be much, much worse. It's no where near what he went through last night. I was feeling fine today, but I started noticing I was feeling strange when I couldn't stomach even 1 mouthful of my dinner. I tried to eat a good amount, but only ended up eating like 1/3 of my food. I've been feeling completely nauseated since then. So much for dinner! Didn't get even close to my caloric range today unfortunately.
Andy thought I was just being dramatic, until he saw my eyes and saw how blood shot they are as well as the surrounding skin. I was like, uhm yeah, I DO feel sick. I guess because I did tell him I was feeling kind of strange after he mentioned that what he had may have been contagious. Thankfully I didn't eat almost anything since breakfast (I tried during the day to eat, I really couldn't) so it hasn't been too bad. I just feel dehydrated. Going to wait two hours before I drink anything though, I don't want to just puke it out again. :(
Outside of that things have been fairly okay. I'm doing well in school, though I'm not sure if I will be able to make it tomorrow feeling like this. I've had a few breakdowns, but I have tried my best to tell people-- No it is NOT your fault I'm crying! Really! And I just try and laugh it off. Thankfully today I didn't cry, and I don't think I cried the day before either so I'm guessing things are getting better.
My mom is worrying so much it just makes me tired. Like c'mon mom, yeah what is happening to me sucks and I know I've had a bad streak but I don't need you worrying about me all the time. I know that's what moms do, and she feels helpless since she's so far away... but I just hate her worrying about things and stressing herself out over things that I know will resolve themselves fairly soon. I didn't even bother telling her how sick I feel today-- it would just pile on to her list of "Worries About Francis."
Some good news: I'm finally at 196 again. I almost didn't count it last time because I think at that point I got sick when I reached 196 with a stomach issue. I weighed myself on Saturday though so I know this has nothing to do with my 1 lb lost. Super proud! 30 lbs feels like such a small number, but then I think, wow 20 more lbs and I will be halfway towards my goal! So yeah, I feel super motivated to continue on. With this sickness I'm betting I might lose more than I'm comfortable with this week, and I think the next week I'll possibly gain the majority of it back. I'm okay with that, I just need to come back to this post next Saturday and remind myself "It is OKAY you were sick last week so that weigh in didn't count as much! It's normal to gain "weight" again after you feel better!"
So yeah, positive thoughts. Hope all of you are having a super-duper week!