Sunday, January 27, 2013
As part of my BLC's Back to the Future week, we are to forgive ourselves for something in our past in the hopes it will help us to move on.
A few years ago I had a pretty major bout of anxiety and depression. I was so riddled with anxiety that I couldn't work, couldn't sleep, couldn't eat and wanted so desperately to get myself checked into a psych center. I was in a relationship at the time, a serious one and we lived together. Eventually, I lost my job and a huge strain was placed on my relationship. We broke up almost two years ago and I blamed this terrible time as part of what drove us apart. I was so pissed that I allowed my stupid self to do this. I was so angry at myself for basically turning on myself.
I've started therapy and thinking about this time in my life. Its become clear that I had this anxiety for a reason and I just didn't know how to deal with it. I'm in the process of learning what caused this all to happen, how I can deal with it again should it happen in the future and how to prevent it.
Something funny I've learned is that my diet, feeding my body right and well, would be of major help. Exercise helps with my anxious feelings. The body is so complex and every part plays a part in another part. When one isn't working right, other things start not working right. I'm on my way to be a well oiled machine.