Sunday, January 27, 2013
So I was home during my winter vacation, working at an awesome internship. But one thing that my mom was really focusing on was my bloodwork that I got back again from the doctors. I got a new set done, and it was a little worse than the one before, so nothing that I did from Thanksgiving to Christmas did anything. I'm not surprised though, holidays and finals and stress tend to hurt.
I've been tracking my calories for the past month or so, and i did do some exercises with my mom (and i've been going to the gym once or twice a week back here at school).
I'm back to counting calories and miserably exercising when I can.
What's really frustrating, especially here at school, is other people. Other people eat whatever they want. Oh, I know that they shouldn't be, and that they will pay for it later, but that doesn't make me feel better. They still get to eat yummy food while i'm over here eating a salad. I need to eat healthy, and they "should", but they can get away with not. And that's the kicker. They have so many more years of eating what they want compared to me because of my genetics, metabolism, and body composition. Just because i'm ahead of the curve doesn't make me feel better.
It just makes me sad.
I have been trying to incorporate snacks that I like into my diet so I do get some food that I like, but it's not the same from being able to eat ice cream and pasta all the time. Especially now that I need to be careful of my carbs.
There is a food addicts in recovery meeting (foodaddicts.org) that's at 8am on Saturdays right down the street (so I don't have to get a friend to drive me) that I think i'm going to try to go to. I don't know if it'll help, but it's free and available. It's just another day that I can't sleep in.
So here's to another year, another try at this whole thing (not a resolution, because those don't tend to do well), another day.